Uncoupled《中年失恋日记（2022）》第一季第五集完整中英文对照剧本.docx

-Oh! Oh God! - Oh my God. Um.天啊！I am so sorry. Are you all right?很抱歉你没事吧？ 没事的没关系No, no, no, no, it's fine.-Um. - That was totally me.完全是我的错Don't you just love living in New York?纽约生活真是令人陶醉不是吗？Grocery shopping one minute.前一刻还在买♥♥菜Hooking up with a hot guy the next.下一刻就和帅哥勾搭上了Totally.没错Condoms?安全套？Are you kidding? Nobody wears condoms now.你开玩笑吗？现在没人戴安全套-What? - Yeah.什么? 是啊-Where have you been? - A long-term relationship that just ended.你怎么这么跟不上时代？ 我刚刚走出一段长久的关系The last time I had sex with a stranger, I was gloved up and layered. 上次和陌生人上♥床♥时我可是全副武装的My dick looked like Annie Hall.鸡鸡裹得严实得像安妮霍尔Who? Anyway, it's a new world now.谁？算了现在时代不同了There*s PrEP. There's post-exposure medications.现在有暴露前预防药暴露后治疗药We've given condoms and network TV back to the straight people, 安全套和电视联播已经回归异性恋人士了where they belong.那才是它们的归属Right, but what about chlamydia, and herpes, and warts,好吧可是衣原体感染、疱疹和尖锐湿疣怎么办？and all the other things I read about waiting for my flu shot.我在等待接种流感疫苗时可读了不少宣传手册You're a real glass-half-empty guy, aren't you?你还真是个悲观的家伙不是吗？He only crossed my mind我只是在收到一本寄给他的杂♥志♥时才想起这个人 when I saw a magazine addressed to him.Psychology Today. He's a new subscriber.今日心理他是新订阅用户Isnrt that sad?是不是很可悲？Because clearly, he's suffering,因为显然他很痛苦and that must have been going on for a long time before.这种痛苦肯定很久以前就开始了甚至早于-What's happening here? - And all I feel is compassion. Not anger. 到底是怎么回事？我的内心只感受到同情没有愤怒He must have been so lonely, and he hid that from me.他一定很孤单而且向我隐瞒了这一点That, along with all the moving boxes and packing tape.也隐瞒了那些搬家的箱子和胶带I know!我知道！Poor Colin. You've gotta be in such enormous pain to behave that way. 可怜的柯林一个人肯定是极其痛苦才会做出这种行为Are you crying for Colin?你在为柯林哭吗？I'm crying for both of us.我在为我们两个流泪And now that I have, I feel like this weight has lifted off me, and Fm free. 哭过之后我感觉整个人轻松了很多我现在自♥由♥了 I'm open. And the world has already responded.我敞开了心怀整个世界已经做出了回应I got one of my clients to make an offer 我有一位客户给切尔西那间一居室提了出价 on that one-bedroom in Chelsea.And you know that that only happened because.你知道这种事情会发生只因为Josh Gibson. The dermatologist my dad's trying to set me up with. 乔希吉布森我爸想给我牵线的那个皮肤科医生-1 don't trust the universe that much. - Do you trust Google?-看来还是不能太相信宇宙命运你相信谷歌♥吗？I'm not sure being pimped out by your dad我不太确定爸爸做媒人这种事isn't the greatest idea of all time!会是什么彻头彻尾的好主意！Oh my God!我的天！See what happens when you're open?瞧瞧开放心态后会发生什么？-Oh, we're gonna hug again. - Aw!好吧又抱一次Permanent vacation. ?Ben is one of my favorites, so I figured I'd like his son.本是我最爰的病人之一所以我想我也会喜欢他的儿子He's a problem-solver. He wants me to get out there.他很善于解决问题他想让我走进恋爰市场You don't seem like much of a problem.你看起来不像是什么"问题”Anyway, he didn't really talk about you very much.不过他也没太聊过你He, uh. he just looked at me and he said, "Do you have love in your life?" 他只是看着我然后说：你的生活中有爱情吗？"-Please tell me you're joking. - It was really sweet.你在开玩笑吧？ 我觉得很贴心And very brave, considering I had a scalpel in my hand.而且非常勇敢毕竟我的手上拿着一把手术刀Then I said, "No, not at the moment, but I'm open.”然后我说：“没有目前没有但我愿意试试And then he suggested you,然后他推荐了你which was a huge relief, considering he's not exactly my type.这让我松了一 口气毕竟他不是我喜欢的类型I'm incredibly grateful I take after my mom.谢天谢地我继承了我妈妈的样子Not that I love dating. There are a lot of weird guys out there.倒不是说我喜欢约会只是这世上有很多奇怪的人Oh my God. I know. It*s crazy now.我的天我太理解了真的很疯狂This guy the other night wanted to have sex with me without a condom.有个人曾经想和我不戴安全套上♥床♥Not how I was raised.我从小接受的教育可不是这样的Well, not that my parents ever actually talked to me about sex.不过我的父母从没跟我聊过性教育They'd just tune the clock radio to Dr. Ruth.他们只会把时钟收音机调到露丝医生的节目Mm. I miss clock radios.我很怀念时钟收音机So now I don't date anyone under 40.所以我现在不和40岁以下的人约会Which may mean that we are not a match?或许这说明我们不太配？I'm both flattered我真的受宠若惊and extremely worried that you operate on my dad with such poor eyesight.但也非常担心你视力这么差还给我爸做手术Well, this has been fun.我聊得很开心What next?接下来呢？Oh, uh, listen, I like you a lot. Tve been having fun as well.听着我很喜欢你我也聊得很开心But I'm not ready to have sex on a first date.但我还没准备好第一次约会时就直接上♥床♥Oh! You.You. you thought that we were gonna have sex tonight?你以为我们今晚会上♥床♥ ?Uh, no, Fve been eating pasta. I meant dessert.不是的我一直在吃意大利面我是指甜点Oh, thank God.真是谢天谢地-Let's order all the desserts. - Yes!-我们把所有甜点都点一遍吧好I opened myself up to the world,我向整个世界敞开心扉and the world delivered this beautiful dermatologist, and it just clicked.世界为我送来一位帅气的皮肤科医生我们一拍即合It's so easy for you gay guys.对你们同性恋来说真简单The wedding announcements in The New York Times?纽♥约♥时♥报♥上的婚礼公告？完全看不到女性的内容 Not a vagina or veil in sight.If you don't count lesbians, which I do, since that's where I'm heading.如果不算上女同性恋的话我会算上这是我要发展的方向And he's a grown-up.而且他很成熟He's accompanying me to Stanley's opening tonight. Great, right?今晚他会陪我参加斯坦利的开幕式很棒吧？Mm. Hooray.真棒啊！Fucking healer. Where*s my hot doctor?该死的治愈大♥师♥我的性感医生在哪里呢？Oh, I think we let this broker suffer long enough.-这个经纪人应该够痛苦了 是啊Right, yeah.Hey, Richard, look, I've been wrestling with my buyer for the last half hour.嘿理查德我跟买♥♥家在会议室里协商了半小时No, wait, stop. Don't pull the offer. Just give me one minute, please!不等等别放弃给我一分钟拜托！I keep telling her it's a great deal for a one-bedroom.我一直跟她说对于一居室来说这个价格很划算I think she'll come up to your seller's number if you guys cover closing costs.如果你们能支付交易费用她应该可以付买♥♥家的要价No, no, no!Sorry, Richard, she's pushing back.抱歉理查德她不太同意要我跟她说不能成交吗？Should I tell her no deal,then you tell your clients to take their chances in this market and wait?然后你去告诉你的客户再冒险等等别的机会？Absolutely. Good call, Richard. Thank you.当然干得好理查德谢谢-He folded. We closed! - Ah!他妥协了我们成交了 ！Whoo!First Claire's penthouse, and now this sweet one-bedroom?先是卖♥♥出了克莱尔的顶层公♥寓♥然后又卖♥♥出了这个一居室？We are back, Suzanne!我们又回来了苏珊！No, you're back. Tm still waitin1 on my miracle cure.是你回来了我还在等待奇迹呢Come to Stanley's opening.来参加斯坦利的开幕活动-You could meet someone. - No.也许你会遇到某人不行Irm staying in. Other people's happiness is very tiring.我得留在家里看别人那么幸福真的很累人Seriously, your dates ask you for free exams?说真的你的约会对象要求你免费做检查？All the time. Before, during, and after.总是这样约会前、约会中、约会后-Some guys get dick pics. I get moles. - Oh!有些人会拍鸡鸡照片我这里有颗痣When Apple sends me my "On This Day" photo； it is always horrifying.苹果给我发送“今日回忆时总会有可怕的照片Well, thank you for doing this.谢谢你陪我来It's, uh. it's for a famous German artist named Wilhelm Munsch.展览是一位著名德国艺术家的作品叫威赫莫牧奇Ah. Great. I love looking at art. I get tired of tea dances and raves.太好了我喜欢观赏艺术我受够了茶舞会和狂欢派对I mean, not everything has to be so gay, gay, gay.不是所有活动都要有同性恋元素（屁♥股♥牧奇展）Huh.We don*t have to stay long.我们不用待太久? Hey. -PWelcome to Butt Munsch.欢迎来到屁♥股♥牧奇展You must be the doctor. Fm Stanley. This is Billy.你一定就是那位医生吧我叫斯坦利这位是比利We could use a dermatologist friend. Stanley's got more tags than a yard sale.皮肤科医生对我们很有用斯坦利的皮赘比后院义卖♥♥的价签还多-Ah! Any time. - Loving the 70s vibe.没问题我喜欢70年代的氛围It's 1978, the year of his first appearance这是1978年也是他头一次出现在in Berlin's premier gay periodical, Das Butt.柏林最有名的同性恋期刊从屁♥股♥出击I even turned the loading dock into a back room.我甚至把装卸区改装成了后屋But people are shy. Please, have sex there.但大家都很害羞拜托请随意在里面做♥爱♥Oh, I think we*re good.那倒是不必了Ooh! Here's Willie. Welcome!威赫莫来了欢迎！We were just saying how beautiful everything looks.我们刚刚正在聊这些作品有多美呢-Yeah, it's. Whew! - Yes. Very, um. vivid. Very.是啊非常栩栩如生震撼人心-Bzz, bzz. - Stirring.How kind. Between you and me, this is not even my best stuff.太感谢了偷偷告诉你这些还不是我最棒的作品Look at that one, Friedrich.看看这个弗里德克That model could have been your father. You have the same.那个模特有可能是你父亲你们的鼻子一模一样Why do you think anyone will pay for this?你为什么觉得有人会买♥♥这些作品？I mean, we have Pornhub now. And I haven't seen any red dots.我们现在有免费色&hearts4青♥网♥站♥墙上没有一幅画贴了已售标签 Except on that one waiter's ass.除那个服务生的屁♥股♥-Hmm. - Ah, sorry, I'm off the clock.抱歉我下班了This crowd will buy, trust me. Once Stossel primes the pump.这群人会买♥♥的相信我等斯多塞尔给买♥♥家们宣讲一番He's a big gay art collector.他可是个同性恋艺术收藏家I've bet the farm on this, and I'm never wrong.我把一切都赌在这上了我从没错过Thanks for the support, Billy. As always.不过谢谢你的支持比利你总是这么支持我Great. He's ten minutes away.很好他还有十分钟就到How do you get fired from a internship?你做实习生怎么会被炒觥鱼？Because I'm a musician, not a sound engineer.因为我是音乐家不是音响工程师Oh!Well, okay. Maybe it*s for the best.好吧也许这样更好You can find a job that might actually pay you.也许你可以找到一份有薪水的工作Once in a while, you could flirt with me.你偶尔也可以和我调调情Ooh! We're in luck! A rom-com marathon.真走运一整晚都能看浪漫喜剧！Ooh!What is this? Ice cream is flirting.什么意思？吃冰淇淋就是在调情啊Mm.By the way, the Jordans want us for dinner next week.对了乔丹一家邀请我们下周吃晚餐Fine. But let's tell them we have an early morning.好吧但告诉他们我们第二天早上还有事Totally. Love him. Hate her.绝对的超爰他讨厌她I'm just being friendly. Besides, Tm on the co-op board.我只是出于礼貌而已再说我可是公♥寓♥管委会的成员You know, sometimes they say ice cream tastes better when it's melted. 有时候人们说冰淇淋融化时味道更好Should we let it rest for an hour?要不要让它融化一小时？An hour?一小时？Okay, now you're flattering me.好吧我可真是太受宠若惊了Ah!Oh my God!天啊！-Oh my God, it's you! - What?-天啊是你！-什么？You're the man in my bed! There's no room for any hot doctor.你就是我床上的那个男人！所以帅气医生才不会来Get out! Get out, get out, get out! Get your ass out!出去！给我滚出去！That's one.一个I remember when you were at Channel Five.我记得你在第五频道时That feature that you did on Hurricane Sandy. Yes, it was amazing.你做了一个桑迪飓风的报道真的很棒I had no idea you were gay.我都不知道你是同性恋I would say thank you, but I'm too evolved.我本会说谢谢但我已经彻底演变了Huh.But thank you.不过还是谢谢你Oh, a patient just clocked me. I should go and say hi. Excuse me.有个病人刚刚看到了我我应该去打个招呼不好意思He's great. How's the sex?他很不错嘛床上功夫如何？No idea. We're takin' it slow. I wanna get to know him as a person.不知道我们在慢慢发展我想先了解他这个人God, why?天啊为什么？Mr. Stossel!斯多塞尔先生！Welcome to Butt Munsch.欢迎来到屁♥股♥牧奇展Allow me to take you through the exhibition. There's a progression.请允许我带你参观一下展览展览是循序渐进的From singles, to doubles, to quintuples,从单人到双人再到五人with a corresponding movement from front to back, 还有相对应的动作从面朝背to back to back, to back on back.到背对背再到背靠背That won't be necessary.不用了I am an art collector, Mr. James.我是艺术收藏家詹姆斯先生This isn't art.这不是艺术It's porn.是色情画Worse.甚至还不如Cartoon porn.是色情卡♥通 ♥Oh my God. Stanley's got everything riding on this.我的天斯坦利把一切都压在这次展览上了Uh. Mr. James.詹姆斯先生Is Leather Urinal still available?皮革小便池还没卖♥♥吧？Um.Yes?是的Not anymore. Where are your little red dots?我买♥♥你的已售标签在哪里？What a relief. Itfs so hard to buy for Anderson Cooper.真是松了一 口气给安德森库珀买♥♥东西真是太难了 I was actually looking at that one.我刚刚也看上那件作品了Fortunately, I have another from the same period.幸运的是我还有同一时期的另一件作品 Let me show you Pig Trough.请来看看猪槽Thank you.谢谢Ahem. Its right over here.就在那边Well played. You*re a good friend.干得好你真是个给力的朋友Thank you.谢谢He wonrt really make me pay for that, will he?他不会真的让我付款吧？This is so weird. I swear I remember this one.太奇怪了我发誓我记得这幅画Oh my God, yes.天啊没错It was on a postcard I bought in the Village in the tenth grade.是我十年级时在格林尼治村买♥♥的一张明信片I was a nervous wreck on the bus home, 我坐公车回家时紧张得要命clutching my backpack like Gollum with the ring.一直抓着背包就像咕噜抓着魔戒一样It was ninth grade for me.我的话是九年级Somebody shoved it in my locker with "faggot'1 scrawled across the back. 有人把它塞进了我的储物柜背面写着“基佬”But the front,但正面 perfect. 完美无缺It was the pride and joy of my teenage wank bank.那可是我青少年时期自♥慰♥收藏品中的精品Me too.我也是Wild.太疯狂了It's like the universe.感觉整个宇宙-Is that your first one? -1 haven't eaten a thing all day.-是你的第一个吗？-我一整天都没吃东西了-This part feels like Christmas morning. - Oh yeah.-这部分感觉就像圣诞节的早晨-没错Opening presents.拆礼物-Mm! -1 hope you like what Santa brought you.希望你喜欢圣诞老人给你带来的礼物Best Christmas ever.简直是最棒的圣诞节All right, my turn.好轮到我了Oh!Whoa, it just keeps on going.层出不穷呢Congratulations to your parents, Paul and Mary Bunyan.恭喜你的父母巨人樵夫夫妇I hope you're not a grower.但愿勃起不会变得更大Oh my God! You are.天啊！还会变得更大Oh, wow!Okay, well, fortunately, I can unhinge my jaw like a python.好吧幸运的是我的下巴可以像巨蟒一样灵活Oh, actually, um.实际上I was hoping that我倒是希望I could.我能Seriously? With that thing?真的吗？用那个家伙？Ill go easy.Just chill, man.别这么紧张Relax.放松就好How? I have been careful for 17 years, and you clearly do this all the time.怎么放松？我小心翼翼生活了 17年你显然是到处约炮-Mm. - Picking up strangers, 和陌生人不戴安全套就循便上♥床♥的那种人and fucking without condoms.So you can forget about barebacking.所以别再想着“赤膊上阵了I can't get turned on when all I can see is my name on that quilt.当我满眼都是被子上自己的名字时我可硬不起来-What quilt? - Oh my God, you millennials!什么被子？ 我的天啊真是千禧一代！Don't you know where we came from? Where you got your freedoms?你不知道我们是从哪里来的吗？你的自♥由♥是怎么来的？Don't you know what people like me.你不知道像我这样的人Well, not me, a little bit older. But I've seen Angels.倒不是我比我更老一些的人但我看过美国天使Don't you know what we sacrificed for you?你不知道我们为你牺牲了多少吗？You know what I do know, Gandalf?你知道我知道什么吗甘道夫？You may be hot, but you're one bitter old queen.你虽然性感但是个愤愤不平的老家伙He called me a bitter old queen. Can you believe that?他说我是个愤愤不平的老家伙你们敢相信吗？Everyone looks old in a grocery store. That overhead lighting.在超♥市♥里所有人看着都很老是头上灯光的问题Pro tip. Wear a pink shirt for some bounce.专业建议穿粉红色的衬衫增加活力-1 assume you met in the meat department. - Ha ha.我猜你们是在肉类销♥售♥区碰到的This is what I've become. This is what Colin has done to me.我已经变成这样了柯林把我变成了这样Well, Colin and time.柯林和时间But come on, don*t I have a right to be a little bitter?拜托难道我就不能愤愤不平吗？我不会太猛的-You are so tense. -1. Uh.-你太紧张了-我Um.-Come here. - Okay.-过来好-Just relax. - I'm sorry.放轻松-对不起I've just been accustomed to a certain size and circumference for a lot of years, 这些年来我一直习惯了一种尺寸和大小and it's kind of minor league with what you got goin' on down there.跟你的比起来简直是小儿科这话我以前也听过You know, I have heard that before.And, um. there is a workaround.倒是有一个解决方法What, poppers and a prayer?肌肉松弛剂和祈祷吗？I can use an anal paralytic. Its off-label, but it works like a charm.我可以用肛♥门♥麻痹剂虽然是非常规用法但很有效果What.什么You wanna Botox my butthole?你想给我的屁♥眼♥注射肉毒杆菌？Just a few ccs.几毫升而已It*ll deaden the sphincter reflex, and then, pah! I'm in.它会麻痹括约肌本能反射然后我就可以进入了There is not one word in that sentence that doesn't terrify me.你说的这句话字字都很吓人Don't worry, I'm great with the needle. You will hardly feel a thing.我很擅长注射你什么都不会感觉到Hardly.什么都Come on. You spent all night telling me how open you are.拜托你一整晚都在跟我说你有多开放Yeah, spir