关于搞笑的英语小短文英语演讲小短文.doc

关于搞笑的英语小短文英语演讲小短文近年来，随着小学英语教学日益为国家和全社会所重视，在许多地方的小学英语已经成为了一门必修课。WTT分享关于搞笑的英语小短文，希望可以帮助大家!关于搞笑的英语小短文：Big Man in a Small TownJoe grew up in a small town, then moved away to attend college and law school.He decided to e back to the small town because he could be a big man in this small town.He really wanted to impress everyone.He opened his new law office, but business was very slow at first.One day, he saw a man ing up the sidewalk to his office.He decided to make a big impression on this new client when he arrived.As the man came to the door, Joe picked up the phone.Hemotioned the man in, all the while saying, “No.Absolutely not.You tell those clowns in New York that I won't settle this case for less than $1 million.Yes.The appeals court has agreed to hear that case ne_t week.I'll be handling the primary argument, and the other members of my team will provide support.Okay.Tell the DA that I'll meet with him ne_t week to discuss the details.”This sort of thing went on for almost five minutes.All the while, the man sat patiently as Joerattled instructions.Finally, Joe put down the phone and turned to the man.“I'm sorry for the delay,” he said, “but as you can see, I'm very busy.What can I do for you?”The man replied, “I'm from the phone pany.I came to hook up your phone.”关于搞笑的英语小短文：Do yo know me?A small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness to the stand in a trial - a grandmotherly, elderly woman.He approached her and asked, “Mrs.Jones, do you know me?”She responded, “Why, yes, I do know you, Mr.Williams.I've known you since you were a young boy.And frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me.You lie, you cheat on your wife, you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs.You think you're a rising big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you will never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher.Yes, I know you.”The lawyer was stunned.Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, “Mrs.Williams, do you know the defense attorney?”She replied, “Why, yes I do.I've known Mr.Bradley since he was a youngster, too.I used to baby-sit him for his parents.And he, too, has been a real disappointment to me.He's lazy,bigoted, and he has a drinking problem.The man can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the shoddiest in the entire state.Yes, I know him.”At this point, the judge rapped the courtroom to silence and called both counselors to the bench.In a very quiet voice, he said with menace, “If either of you asks her if she knows me, you'll be jailed for contempt!”关于搞笑的英语小短文：StrangeA lawyer named Strange died, and his friend asked the tombstone maker to inscribe on his tombstone, “Here lies Strange, an honest man, and a lawyer.”The inscriber insisted that such an inscription would be confusing, for passers-by would tend to think that three men were buried under the stone.However he suggested an alternative.He would inscribe, “Here lies a man who was both honest and a lawyer.”“That way, whenever anyone walked by the tombstone and read it, they would be certain to remark, 'That's Strange.'”“关于搞笑的英语小短文”END第 5 页 共 5 页