2021届上海市静安区高三英语二模概要写作指导学案.docx
2021静安二模 Your co-worker brings in brownies, your daughter makes cookies for a holiday party and candy is arriving from far-flung relatives. Sugar appears on almost all joyful occasions. It is celebration, festivity and family love. Its also dangerous. Sugar, perhaps more than salt, contributes to the development of cardiovascular disease. Evidence is growing that eating an undue amount of sugar can lead to fatty liver disease, hypertension, Type 2 diabetes, obesity and kidney disease.你的同事带来巧克力蛋糕，你的女儿为节日聚会做饼干，糖果从远方的亲戚那里送来。 糖几乎出现在所有快乐的场合。 这是庆祝，节日和家庭之爱。 这也很危险。 糖，也许比盐更有助于心血管疾病的发展。 越来越多的证据表明，摄入过多的糖会导致脂肪肝、高血压、2 型糖尿病、肥胖症和肾脏疾病。 Yet people cant resist it. And the reason for this is pretty simple. People just cant resist it. And we dont mean disability to resist it in the way that people talk about delicious foods. We mean the weakness, literally, in a similar way of drugs due to the fact that the sugar manufacturers are doing everything they an to keep us hooked.然而人们无法抗拒。 原因很简单。 人们简直无法抗拒。 我们并不是说人们无法像人们谈论美味的食物那样抗拒它。 从字面上看，我们的意思是药物的弱点，因为糖制造商正在竭尽全力让我们上瘾。 Just a few hundred years ago, concentrated sugars were essentially absent from the human diet. Sugar was a rare source of energy in the environment, and strong longings for it benefited humans for living on. Sugar longings initiated searches for sweet foods, the kinds that help us layer on fat for times of scarcity.就在几百年前，人类饮食中基本上没有浓缩糖分。 糖是环境中一种稀有的能量来源，对它的强烈渴望使人类赖以生存。 对糖的渴望引发了对甜食的搜索，这种食物可以帮助我们在稀缺的时候增加脂肪。 Today concentrated sugar is everywhere, used in approximately 75 percent of packaged foods purchased in the United States. The average American consumes anywhere from a quarter to a half pound of sugar a day. If you consider that the concentrated sugar in a single can of soda might be more than what most people would have consumed in an entire year just a few hundred years ago, you get a sense of how dramatically our environment has changed. The sweet longing that once offered an advantage now works against us.如今，浓缩糖无处不在，在美国购买的约 75% 的包装食品中都使用了浓缩糖。 美国人平均每天消耗四分之一到半磅的糖。 如果您考虑到一罐汽水中的浓缩糖分可能比几百年前大多数人一整年所消耗的糖分还要多，您就会了解我们的环境发生了多么巨大的变化。 曾经提供优势的甜蜜渴望现在对我们不利。 A better approach to sugar rehab(康复) is to promote the consumption of whole, natural foods. Substituting whole foods for sweet industrial synthetic foods may be a hard sell, but in the face of an industry that is exploiting our biological nature to keep us addicted, it may be the best solution for those who need that sugar fix.糖康复的更好方法是促进食用完整的天然食物。 用完整的食物代替甜的工业合成食品可能很难卖，但面对一个利用我们的生物性质让我们上瘾的行业，对于那些需要糖修复的人来说，这可能是最好的解决方案。 【参考答案】 Sugar accompanies happiness but too much sugar causes various diseases. Peoples sugar addiction results from tempting behaviors of sugar industry. In the past, concentrated sugars were rare and peoples sugar desire has helped survival. Comparatively, peoples sugar consumption today is alarmingly huge. For sugar withdrawal, we should eat whole natural food instead of processed food.糖伴随着幸福，但过多的糖会导致各种疾病。 人们的糖瘾源于制糖业的诱人行为。 过去，浓缩糖很少见，人们对糖的渴望有助于生存。 相比之下，今天人们的糖消费量惊人地大。 对于戒糖，我们应该吃全天然食品而不是加工食品。 概要写作的写作步骤第一步：阅读A. 认真阅读给定的原文材料。如果一遍不能理解，就多读两遍。阅读次数越多，你对原文的理解就越深刻。B.该决定原文中哪些部分重要，哪些部分次重要了。对重要部分的主要观点进行概括。C. 简要地记下主要观点主题、标题、细节等你认为对概括摘要重要的东西。第二步：动手写作A. 摘要应尽量用自己的话完成。不要直接引用原文的句子。B. 应该遵循原文的逻辑顺序。这样你就不必重新组织观点、事实。C. 摘要必须全面、清晰地表明原文所载的信息，以便你的读者不需翻阅原文就可以完全掌握材料的原意。D. 写摘要时可以采用下列几种小技巧：1) 删除细节。只保留主要观点。2) 选择一至两个例子。原文中可能包括5个或更多的例子，你只需从中筛选一至二个例子。3) 把长段的描述变成短小、简单的句子。如果材料中描述某人或某事用了十个句子，那么你只要把它们变成一两句即可。4) 避免重复。在原文中，为了强调某个主题，可能会重复论证说明。但是这在摘要中是不能使用的。应该删除那些突出强调的重述句。5) 压缩长的句子。如下列两例：“His courage in battle might without exaggeration be called lion-like.”可以概括为：”He was very brave in battle.”“He was hard up for money and was being pressed by his creditor.”可以概括为：”He was in financial difficulties.”6) 还可以使用词组代替整句或者从句。请看下面的例子："Beautiful mountains like Mount Tai, Lushan Mountain, and Mount Huang, were visited by only a few people in the past. Today, better wages, holidays with pay, new hotels on these mountains, and better train and bus services, have brought them within reach of many who never thought of visiting them ten years ago.”可以概括为："Beautiful mountains like Mount Tai, once visited by only a few people, are today accessible to many, thanks to better wages, paid holidays, new hotels and better transportation services.”7) 使用概括性的名词代替具体的词，比如：“She brought home several Chinese and English novels, a few copies of Time and Newsweek and some textbooks. She intended to read all of them during the winter vocation.”可以概括为：”She brought home a lot of books to read during the vocation.”8）使用最短的连接词。比如，可以使用but, then, thus, yet, though，不能使用at the same time, in the first place, because of these, on the other hand等较长的连接词。通常，使用分号就能够达成使用连接词的效果。9) 文章中的第一人称说的话通常在摘要中转换成第三人称，从而把大段的对白简化，比如：Kate looked at Paul disapprovingly: You use much too much salt on your food, Paul its not good for you!” Paul put down his knife and frowned: “Why on earth not! If you didnt have salt on your food it would taste awful like eating cardboard or sand just imagine bread without salt in it, or potatoes or pasta cooked without salt!” Kate was patient. She didnt want to quarrel with Paul. She wanted to persuade him. She said firmly: "But too much salt is bad for you. It causes high blood pressure and later on, heart-attacks. It also disguises the taste of food, the real tastes which are much more subtle than salt, and which we have lost the sensitivity to appreciate any more.”可以用第三人称概括为：Kate suggested Paul that he should eat less salt. She thought that eating too much salt would do hard to Pauls health and that it could reduce the real tastes of food. But Paul disagreed. He said that food without salt would be tasteless.第三步：修改成文首先，与原文比较看是否把所有重要的观点都概括了，摘要中的观点是否与原文中的完全一致。其次，如果摘要中出现了不必要的词汇、短语或长句子，删除它们。第三，检查拼写、语法和标点符号的错误。最后，保持语言简单明了。另外，可以通过以下五个方面来核对(checklist)写好的摘要。1. Does the summary include the main points?2. Are words or sentences copied or your own words?3. Are there any ideas outside the passage?4. Are transitional words used to make writing coherent?5. Are all the sentences, spelling, and punctuation marks correct?
