托福作文写作范文详解Some.docx
托福作文写作范文详解Some people prefer to work for themselves or own a business. Others prefer to work for an employer. Would you rather be self-employed, work for someone else, or own a business? Use specific reasons to explain your choice.1.题目翻译有些人喜欢自己拥有企业并为自己工作，另外有些人喜欢为雇主工作。你喜欢哪个？2 .审题关键词：Prefer; Work for themselves/ self-employed; Own a business;Work for an employer; Specific reasons3 .论证分析：分论点 1： Working for an employer will help me accumulate experience and capital before starting my own business.分论点 2: Working for an employer will help me know better about the business operation as well as myself.分论点 3: At the right time I'll consider to own my own business to realize my career goal.范文Some people prefer to work for themselves or own a business. Others prefer to work for an employer. Personally, I prefer to work for myself. I choose to be self-employed because of the reasons as follows.此段结构首段，第一句话提出背景，第二句话讲出了作者的观点，第三句话引出 下文的理由分析。此段功能首段为文章提供了背景，陈述了作者论点，并进行简单的过渡。I can decide what I do according my own willing and interest. This point is the most important because one person can find work motivity from his interest. I also can decide how to do the thing. I can choose my own directions and ways, whereas those who are employed by others must do work according to the directions of their employers.此段结构 总分的结构，开头提出论点，即另有自己才能清楚知道自己的意愿和兴 趣并且根据它们来做决定。接下来从两个方面来进行解释说明，第一个, 兴趣是工作的最大动力；第二个，the self-employed能够自主自由地 决定自己的工作方式，而不用受制于人。此段功能本段是文章第二段，提出了正文的第一个支持论点。The other important point is that I have freedom to decide when I do the thing. The time I work is determined by myself I am not constricted by other people. Hence, if I am tired, I can rest in thedaytime; if I have more energy, I can work late at night. I have more freedom on the choice of work time than those who work for an employer.此段结构总分的结构，开头提出论点，即在自主创业的情况下，工作时间也可以 由自己灵活决定。后面对论点进行了进一步解释，灵活的工作时间能保 证体能和工作效率的最大化。此段功能 本段是文章第三段，提出了正文的第二个支持论点。I work for myself, so I only can depend on myself. This can train me to learn more knowledge and to work hard and teach me to face the success and the failure correctly. I can learn how to take advantage of different conditions and deal with different situations from the practice. I can learn to encourage myself when I succeed and not to be afraid of difficulties and failures.此段结构总分的结构，开头提出论点，即自主创业意味着全面的自我承当。后面 对论点进行了进一步解释，自主自立会促使自己更加努力，也能亲身体 会成败的不同滋味，在这个过程中积累经验，也学会如何正确面对成功 不失败。此段功能本段是文章第四段，提出了正文的第三个支持论点。Based on the above statements, I think that self-employing has more advantages. So I prefer to be self-employed.此段结构 首句承上启下进行总结，最后一句再次强调自己的观点。此段功能 本段是文章的尾段，承接了上文，总结了观点，并重新陈述了作者立场。总分值要素剖析：一、语言表达本文的语言比拟工整，没有太多的亮点，用词也很平常，但是在表情达 意上都很准确，属于在自己能力范围内发挥最大优势的好例子。1.1 can choose my own directions and ways, whereas those who are employed by others must do work according to the directions of their employers.本句在文中算是少有的长句，用 whereas引导两种工作方式的比照，从句包含定语从句来指代受雇于他 人这一类型的人，利落干净。2. I have more freedom on the choice of work time than those who work for an employer.本句是 more than 句型的灵活运用, 在表达雇员这一类型的人群时，也用了定语从句来修饰，相比于第一句 来说，此句中用了另外一种表达，防止重复使用的情况。3.1 can learn how to take advantage of different conditions and deal with different situations from the practice.在这个句子中, take advantage of和deal with都是比拟好的动词词组,分别表达 利用和对付的意义，十分准确。二、逻辑结构 本文采用的是比照论证的方式，在全文三个分论点中，作者都就自由职 业戒者自主创业的情况和作为普通雇员的情况进行比照式的讨论，最后 总结自己比拟偏好的类型，从而再次引导出选择的原因和理由。本文的 这种比照式的论证在每个分论点下都进行了两面的比拟，全面地支撑各 个论点，到达统一。在结构方面，采用的是总分总的架构，开头结尾照应，中间摆论点并做 进一步分析。
