2024届高三英语一轮复习读后续写讲评课件.pptx

1.A few days before Christmas,while enjoying coffees,my girlfriend and I noticed a woman trying to get her bank card to work.2.“Do you know her?”I asked my friend.3.“I do.Give me a minute.Im going to go and see if I can help,”she replied,standing up to walk over to her.4.A few minutes later,my friend returned to the table with the woman.The woman looked upset.Her eyes were swollen(adj.肿胀的),as if shed been crying all night.She looked pale,tired,and messy.After I was introduced,my friend asked her if she was okay.She admitted she wasnt and burst into tears.5.I could sense she was a little embarrassed by her emotional response.Wanting to put her at ease,I quickly told her not to worry.I shared that I was a new mom with many troubles and Id already cried fourteen times that day.She laughed but soon her tears were flowing again.6.For the next forty-five minutes,my friend and I both sat and patiently listened to her.She lost her husband before Christmas and their bank accounts were now left nothing.As a stay-at-home mom of two,in one split second,her entire life had come crashing down around her.7.We tried our best to cheer her up.My friend even tried to give her some cash,which she refused.When she finally got up to leave,she wiped her tears,thanked us both for listening,and walked out.As I drove home,I couldnt stop thinking about how depressed she looked when she left the cafe.No one deserves to feel that sad,I thought,especially right before Christmas.There must be something I can do to help.I racked my brain(绞尽脑汁)for an answer.读后续写四步骤通读全文，理清脉络理清情节，对应情&感细读首句，构思主线优化双线，着手写作WhenWhereWhoPlot(What、Why、How)A few days before Christmasin/at the cafe“I”,my girlfriend and the woman The woman lost her husband and their bank accounts were now left nothing(para.6)My friend tried to give her some cash,which she refused.(para.7)I racked my brain for an answer to help her.(para.7)圣诞节，帮助这位没有丈夫,没有钱，带着两孩子，有自尊的女士通读通读全文，理清全文，理清脉络脉络1概括六要素分析 5W1HParagraph 1:Gladly,a solution came.Q:What is“a solution”？How do you describe the solution?Paragraph 2:The kids were overjoyed when hearing that Santa(圣诞老人)sent them gifts.Q:How did the children hear the news？Whats the function of Santa sending them gifts?段首翻译段首翻译&分析分析两段首句定段一段二首句正能量第一段的框架第一段的框架由由第一段首句与第二段首句第一段首句与第二段首句确定确定第二段的框架由第二段的框架由第二段首句第二段首句与与正能量正能量结尾来确定结尾来确定Gladly,a solution came._The kids were overjoyed when hearing that Santa(圣诞老人)sent them gifts._ 由“Gladly,a solution came.”可知，续写段首句可具体描写解决方法是什么，“我”朋友得反应，“我”为此所做的准备。由第二段“when hearing”可逆推出，该段应描写到圣诞老人来送礼物。根据“The kids were overjoyed when hearing that Santa sent them gifts.”,前一段应描写到圣诞老人送礼物，本段应描述圣诞节当天的情况，妈妈的表现与想法；结尾应呼应原文主题，体现正能量升华。细读首句，构思主线2Gladly,a solution came._.理清情节，对应情&感3Plot lineEmotion line方法是.告诉好友一起做准备兴奋/开心非常赞同高兴行动送礼物去Psy.line愉快地保护“她”脆弱的自尊心，还要解决困难心情隐藏感想The kids were overjoyed when hearing that Santa sent them gifts._.理清情节，对应情感Plot lineEmotion linePsy.line母亲行为表现找理由让她接受怀疑/尴尬真诚感谢“我们”坚持“我”开心问题解决AII开心难忘的圣诞节/帮助他人的开心（我）/被无私帮助的感激（她）隐藏感想开放式主题升华优化优化双线双线，着手写作，着手写作4A good compositionNeat handwriting 7 Complete para.5Logical 3加分项：1.续写内容质量佳；2.故事完整与原文情境融合度高；3.所用词汇，语法准确、恰当、多样；4.上下文衔接，全文连贯等.扣分项：1.词数少于130词；2.书写较差影响阅读；3.单词拼写，语法错误等.爱国是我们的责任，然而其方式有所不同。某英文报爱国是我们的责任，然而其方式有所不同。某英文报爱国是我们的责任，然而其方式有所不同。某英文报爱国是我们的责任，然而其方式有所不同。某英文报纸就此主题向中学生征稿，要求同学们谈谈自己平时纸就此主题向中学生征稿，要求同学们谈谈自己平时纸就此主题向中学生征稿，要求同学们谈谈自己平时纸就此主题向中学生征稿，要求同学们谈谈自己平时是怎样做的，还有什么打算以及对爱国的认识。是怎样做的，还有什么打算以及对爱国的认识。是怎样做的，还有什么打算以及对爱国的认识。是怎样做的，还有什么打算以及对爱国的认识。Its our duty to love our country.However,there are different ways to show our love.How to write the How to write the beginning?beginning?_featureSimple Simple ClearClearMain ideaMain idea英语习作评价英语习作评价&分析分析1字迹不够工整、有涂改标点符号贴前段文字右下，末尾句号用词错误单词拼写、单复数、词性错误段二用第三人称22字迹工整袜子sockssharp强烈的be given by sb.her/smiledsmile重复was/to helpThe woman stood there and opened mouth,words failed her.The woman was grateful to us,bowing over and over again to express her gratitude.I talked with them,knowing that they were happy beyond description.I could dress up to be Santa and send some gifts to the woman and her children.2 2 思源1 1小楠Its the love that makes us through the hard time.we played with kids,floating in the ocean of happiness.3 3 胡双4 4 晓辉5 5 翔云My friend looked at me excitedly,agreeing the idea.Gladly,a solution came.I decided to make Christmas a little better for her family by buying them some gifts without hurting her pride.As soon as I got home,I called my girlfriend excitedly and explained my plan.She agreed with me and offered to buy and deliver the presents with me.On Christmas Eve morning,we drove to the womans house with a large box of food and a few presents in the name of Santa,imagining their reactions when they found out that Santa had sent them gifts when they were least expecting it.The kids were overjoyed when hearing that Santa had sent them gifts.However,their mom seemed embarrassed at first.It was not until we insisted that Christmas was a time for shared joy and Santa didnt accept returns that she accepted the presents and thanked our kindness sincerely.Seeing their faces filled with joy made me feel like I had made a real difference to their lives.The gifts were just the beginning,hopefully enough to put the familys lives back on track.I had a feeling that this would be a Christmas to remember.(去段首176 words)八三四法则八个“不”三个原则正能量原则原文一致原则七不违背逻辑常理（符合逻辑发展）六不偏离原文主题（贴合主题）五不在文末设置悬念（解决问题）四不用负能量结局（和谐社会，正能量）三不用过多对话（不能推动情节发展，凑字数）一不增加人物（解决已有矛盾）二不增加旁支情节（贴合主线发展）曲折性原则:前后衔接、连贯、语言风格一致:正能量:会遇到困难，但最终能解决八不瞎写（不抄袭或瞎编）注意：原文没有对话，续写中也要_对话。尽量避免挖已有材料写作积累挖已有材料写作积累-哭泣哭泣1.Her eyes were swollen(adj.肿胀的),as if shed been crying all night.2.She admitted she wasnt and burst into tears.3.She laughed but soon her tears were flowing again.4.When she finally got up to leave,she wiped her tears,thanked us both for listening,and walked out.HomeworkHomework：RewriteRewrite&accumulataccumulate e情绪语料积累情绪语料积累-喜悦喜悦HomeworkHomework：RewriteRewrite&accumulataccumulate e名词名词delight 高兴事joy 高兴、乐趣happiness 快乐、幸福amusement 愉悦形容词形容词delighted 喜悦的cheerful 欣喜的merry 愉快的amused 觉得好笑的动词动词smile 微笑laugh 大笑giggle 咯咯笑chuckle 低声轻笑grin 露齿笑smirk 洋洋得意的笑hum 哼小曲情绪语料积累情绪语料积累-喜悦喜悦1.We headed for the top of the mountain in high spirits.(兴高采烈地)2.She waved her hands with joy.(开心/高兴地)3.Seeing the little dog,her face lit up.(她脸上露出喜色)4.A bright smile spread across the little girls face.(脸上洋溢着灿烂的笑容)5.Cold and hungry though she was,her heart was filled with joy/gratitude.(心里充满了喜悦)6.I had never felt so happy from the bottom of my heart.(从心底里感到很高兴)7.Xiaoye was so happy that she felt as if she had been the luckiest person in the world.8.So happy was Xiaoye that she felt as if she had been the luckiest person in the world.9.To her great joy(令她非常高兴的是),he received offers from two big companies at the same time.10.The little girl couldnt contain her joy,like a dog with two tails.(无法抑制她的喜悦)HomeworkHomework：RewriteRewrite&accumulataccumulate e情绪语料积累情绪语料积累-悲伤悲伤名词名词sadness 悲伤sorrow 悲伤misery 痛苦regret 悔恨depression 沮丧 disappointment 失望 desperation 绝望 frustration 挫折形容词形容词upset 心烦的disappointed 失望的heartbroken 心碎的frustrated 受挫的depressed 沮丧的low-spirited 情绪低落的desperate 绝望的regretful 悔恨的动词动词cry 哭weep 哭泣sob 抽泣choke 哽咽sigh 叹气frown 皱眉情绪语料积累情绪语料积累-悲伤悲伤1.(With)her head drooping(耷拉着脑袋),Lucy sat at the riverbank,thinking about something.2.Her cheeks were shining with tears.(闪烁着泪光)3.Tears blurred my vision.(泪水模糊了我的视线)4.Out of the corner of my eye I could see the little girl sobbing.(抽泣)5.She wept at once,with sudden,wild abandonment(失声痛哭，暴风骤雨一般，无所顾忌),in her sisters arms.6.Feeling a lump in his throat(感到喉咙哽咽),he couldnt help crying.(忍不住哭了)7.Catching the sight of the scene,I could feel that my throat tightened(感到喉咙哽咽)and my eyes overflowed with tears.(热泪盈眶/满眼泪水)The roses in her hand,the flavor in mine.