托福作文写作范文详解rodu.docx

托福作文写作范文详解ReadingMany consumers ignore commercial advertisements. In response, advertising companies have started using a new tactic, called "buzzing." The advertisers hire people,buzzers,who personally promote (buzz) products to people they know or meet. The key part is that the buzzers do not reveal that they are being paid to promote anything. They behave as though they were just spontaneously praising a product during normal conversation. Buzzing has generated a lot of controversy, and many critics would like to see it banned.First, the critics complain that consumers should know whether a person praising a product is being paid to praise the product. Knowing this makes a big difference: we expect the truth from people who we believe do not have any motive for misleading us. But with buzzing what you hear is just paid advertising, which may well give a person incorrect information about the buzzed product.Second, since buzzers pretend they are just private individuals, consumers listen to their endorsements less critically than they should. With advertisements in print or on TV, the consumer is on guard for questionable claims or empty descriptions such as "new and improved." But when consumers do not know they are being lobbied, they may accept claims they would otherwise be suspicious of. This may suit the manufacturers, but it could really harm consumers.And worst of all is the harmful effect that buzzing is likely to have on social relationships. Once we become aware that people we meet socially may be buzzers with a hidden agenda, we will become less trustful of people in general. So buzzing will result in the spread of mistrust and the expectation of dishonesty.ListeningHi, my name is Bill. Um, I was talking your professor in the subway about the great phone service that I was using. And it turned out we' re both interested in marketing. So he asked me to talk in his marketing classes. You see, I am a buzzer, part time, you know. During the day, r m a student just like you. Now, I read that piece attacking buzzing, it is really misleading. How would it describe buzzing leading a lot, and gives a wrong impression?First, it makes it sound like buzzers don' t tell the truth about the products they' re buzzing. That' s not true. How buzzing works this. Companies find people who use their products and who really think product is good. So buzzing is not like ordinary advertisement where an actress is paid to read some lies. Urn, yes, I get paid for telling you what I am thinking, but you get the truth from buzzers. I really do think my phone service is great. That is why the company hired me.Second, the reading makes it seem that when a buzzer talks to someone, the person believes whatever they hear from the buzzer. Not true. In fact, the opposite is true. People I talk to ask a lot of questions about the products I buzz, that is about the price, service and how long I used the product. If I don' t have good answers, they won' t buy the products.Finally, if you believe what you read, buzzing will destroy civilization, that is stupid. If a product is bad, the company can' t recruit buzzers. So what you get from a buzzer is not only sincere but is likely to be about a good product If you try the phone service I use, you' re gonna love it. So people who try buzzed products are going to have a good experience. So end up being more trustful and open up to people.一、阅读听力要点概括Reading PassageMain points: Buzzing created a lot controversy and should be banned.Sub point 1: Consumers should know whether a person is paid to say such thing.Sub point 2: Consumers are less critically and get harmed.Sub point 3: Buzzing hurt our social relationships.LectureAttitude: It is misleading.Sub Point 1: Buzzers tell the truth. (Real users, True thinking.)Sub Point 2: Buzzer answers a lot questions. (Price, Service, good answers.)Sub Point 3: Buzzer won' t destroy civilization. (Sincere and good product. Good experience. More trust.)二.范文逐段赏析Paragraph 1As stated in the reading, many critics propose that buzzing be banned. Yet a buzzer, Bill, who disagrees with these critics, argues for buzzing in three important aspects.此段功能：（Listening passage后文提到用L代替）（Reading passage 后文用 R 代替）以L的观点为主要观点，先说许多批评家认为这种聊天式传销应该被 禁止，但是一位传销者，Bill,准备从三方面反驳这个观点。此段结构：作者先一句话总结了 R中的结论，接着一句话告诉大家，L确定逻辑 为反，准备从三方面来辩论。Paragraph 2First, he asserts that the point made in the reading, that buzzers don' t tell the truth, is false. Although buzzers are paid by companies, he states, they are actually previous users who have enjoyed the product and willing to share their real thoughts with others.此段功能: 以L的观点起头，谈sub topic 1 , L主张：R中他们这种转销者是 说谎的传闻是错误的。接下来他的证据是，虽然公司付钱给他们，他们 其实早就是产品的用户，能和其他人真实分享体验。此段结构：此段为总分结构。第一句巧妙的结合了 R的观点，陈述L的观点 (Don't tell truth is false).接下来一系列的证据有力的支撑了 L的观 占 /oParagraph 3Second, he argues against a buzzers7 role in misleading consumers as shown in the reading. He states that consumers remain clear and skeptical while being buzzed. They ask questions about details such as price, service and the buzzer7 s familiarity before drawing their final decision according to the responses.此段功能： 还是以L观点出发，L接着说：R中传销者误导客户的说法也是错误 的。L举例说，顾客在被传销过程中也是抱着怀疑和聪明的态度。他们 做出决定前会问很多细节问题例如价格，服务，传销者的熟悉程度等等。此段结构: 此段为总分结构。第一句总结L的观点，接着搬出L的实际例子让人 信服。Paragraph 4Third, he says that the article1 s claims about the harmful effects imposed by buzzing on civilization neglects to inform the reader that buzzers are only employed to promote worthy products and to leave consumers a nice experience, result of which is to improve society as a whole.此段功能：讨论sub topic 3, L接着反对R的最后一个观点：传销影响人们之间 的文明。L指出，R在指责的时候没有告诉读者传销者只促销他们觉得 有价值的产品而且可以给顾客留下很好的体验，这样的感觉恰恰能使社 会进步。此段结构：此段为分总结构，L 一个超长句里先表示了 R的证据有遗漏，接着解 释遗漏是什么，最后说遗漏的这点恰好能推翻R自己的做出的观点。三、范文全篇总评1、逻辑结构全文遵从总分结构第一段上来总结了 R的观点确认了 L的反对逻辑,然后告诉读者将有三个方面的论证。非常的直截了当。后三个论段中, 作者用非常朴实的手法，清晰的复述了 R的观点并说L的反驳态度，接下来充分的证据支撑了态度。难点还是在听力，听完L的态度还要记下L的实际例子。2、语言表达全文非常朴实，基本按照，复述R ,举L的新证据，L达到驳倒目的,这种手法写作。其中可借鉴的词句：1. As stated in.（某事实证据）.就像（某事实）说的那样，Promote :促生，提升，推销。/Advance/Upgrade/The ping-pang team promoted the relationship between China and USA.