英语写作的主题句和段落课件.ppt

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1、关于英语写作的主题句和段落现在学习的是第1页，共86页段落的结构段落的结构o“人之立言，因字而成句，积句而成章，积章而成篇。”o刘勰文心雕龙章句o一篇文章只有漂亮生动的句子还是不够的，我们还必须注意把文意所衔领的句子按照一定的规律组织起来，成为一个或者数个段落，从而使要表达的各层意思都清晰分明。只有这样构成的文章，才会给人浑然一体但又清晰有致的美感。o现在学习的是第2页，共86页o一、主题句一、主题句o“揭全文之指，或在篇首，或在篇中，或在篇末。在篇首，则后必顾之；在篇末，则前必注之；在篇中，则前注之，后顾之。”这是刘熙载在艺概中讲的话，虽然说的是汉语整篇文章的写作，但同样适用于英文段落。在比

2、较正规的英文写作(formalwriting)中，往往就有这样的“揭全段之旨”的句子，它就是主题句(topicsentence)。简单一点说，主题句就是对全段主题的概括性陈述。段落中其他的句子都是对它的扩展、支持或证明。o主题句起着统摄全段的作用。在写作者一方，下笔可以力顾着眼点，做到内容醒目突出而且不跑题。而在读者一方，则可以通过主题句迅速地明确作者的主题，读起文章来比较快捷。o需要指出的是，英语文章对全文的主旨句和段落主题句的要求是非汉语文章所及的。受两种文化的影响，汉语文章在结构方面往往比英语文章更加随意，作者既可以开门见山立显要旨，也可曲径通幽委婉道来，甚至可以指桑骂槐旁敲侧击。对于主

3、题的揭示很多情况下都采取“春秋笔法”，隐而不说。英语的文章段落则要明白得多，往往需要规矩完整的主旨句和主题句。这一点需要每一个英语作文学习者寄予相当的注意。为加强这方面的意识，我们下面看毛荣贵和DorineS.Houston合编的中国大学生作文评改中的两个例子：现在学习的是第3页，共86页oInthisworld,weshouldthinkmoreofotherpeoplethanofourselves.Bysodoing,ourworldwillbefullofhappiness.This,ofcourse,ismypersonalview.ButitisalessonIhavedrawnf

4、romoneofmyownexperience.Sonow,Iwouldliketosharethatexperiencewithyou,mydearreader.o这是一名中国大学生的作文ApplauseontheBus中的开头。在本书的中国编者看来，这样的开头自然而且不俗，符合汉语写作的习惯。然而美国编者认为：Thisisessentiallyasolidessay.ThewriterusesananecdotetomakeapointNowwejustneedtogiveitagood,strongtopicsentenceusingthewritersownideastoformit.

5、她给这个开头段拟了下面的主题句：现在学习的是第4页，共86页oAlittlegirltaughtme,andabusfulofpeople,animportantlessonabouttheimportanceofthinkingmoreofotherpeoplethanofourselves.oOnedayItookaverycrowdedbustoschool现在学习的是第5页，共86页o在另外一篇作文PartofMyChildhood中，作者开头是这样写的：oInmychildhood,thereweresomanythingsthatwereworthcallingtomind.Som

6、emademehappy,somemademeexcited,andsomemademesad.Butamongthemwasanunforgettablething,whenIthinkofit,mygoodfriendTongTongwilloccurtome.o作为汉语读者来说，首先用抒情的笔法奠定一种氛围，然后引导读者逐渐进入对于往事的回忆，这样的开头是非常自然而且感人的。但是美国编者显然不这样认为：oThisisamovingstoryaboutfriendswhohavequarreled.Itneedsagoodtopicsentencetobringthereaderintot

7、hefeelingsandmessagethewriterwantstoconvey.o这位美国编者提供了这样的开头：现在学习的是第6页，共86页oOneofthemostunforgettableexperienceofmychildhoodinvolvesmygoodfriendTongTong.IthappenedwhenIwaseightyearsold.o我们从上面两个例子可以看出，尽管有千篇一律的嫌疑，英语的写作追求的审美效果和汉语写作是大相异趣的。学习英文写作，对这样的差异要时刻牢记。现在学习的是第7页，共86页o主题句的位置主题句的位置o一般说来，主题句既可以是在段落的开始，也

8、可以处于段落的中间或者末尾。o1）主题句在段首o主题句放在句首是英语段落写作中最常见的一种方法。中国大学生作文评改的中国作者毛荣贵说：“笔者曾就美版的ReadersDigest和Time两本期刊的100篇短文做过调查，发现其中仅有两篇其topicsentence较为模糊，而有68篇的topicsentence均被置于文/段首，其余30篇已经将段落的topicsentence升格为小标题。”根据这种情况，我们建议所有的英语作文初学者将段落的主题句放置于段首。下面是几个相应的例子：现在学习的是第8页，共86页oJane and Karen have many things in common.To

9、beginwith,bothgirlshavethesamebackground.JanewasbornandraisedintheWest,andsowasKaren.Next,bothgirlsareinterestedinthesamekindsofsubjectsinschool.JanelikesFrench,history,andEnglish.Inthesameway,KarenlikesSpanish,historyandEnglish.Furthermore,bothgirlswanttobeteachers.Janeplanstobecomeanelementaryscho

10、olteacher.ButKarenwantstobeahighschoolteacher.Asyoucansee,thetwogirlsarealmostliketwins.现在学习的是第9页，共86页oEven when we are very careful in the things we do each day,the risk ofloss and injury is always with us.Startingthedaywithashower,weriskslippingandfallingthroughtheglassdoor.Ridingtowork,weriskcoll

11、ision.Whileweareawayfromourhomes,theriskoffireandburglaryisgreater.Goingtoschool,ourchildrenriskbeinginjured.Wealsolossthroughunintentionalactionsofourownthatmightinjureothers.Sucheventsmayoccurregardlessofhowcarefulwemaytrytobe,andtheycancostusalotofmoney.Ratherthantakingthechanceofbeingwipedoutfin

12、ancially,wetransfersomeorourriskstoothers,webuyinsurance.现在学习的是第10页，共86页oEating lunch is one of my favorite pastimes.Becauselunchcomesinthemiddleoftheday,itgivesmeawelcomebreakfromstudying.Atschool,lunchmeansthirtyminutesoutofclassandachancetorestafterthemorningswork.Whileeating,IcanplanwhatImgoingt

13、odointheafternoon.Andbesidesofferingapleasantbreakintheday,lunchisalwaysagoodmeal.现在学习的是第11页，共86页o2）主题句在段落中间oTheofficersofmostdoctorstodayareoverloadedwithpeoplewhoareconvincedthatsomethingdreadfulisabouttohappentothem.Atthefirstsignofpaintheyruntoadoctor,failingtorealizethatpainisrarelyanindication

14、orpoorhealth.We are becoming a nation of pill-grabbers and hypochondriacs who regard the slightest ache as a searing ordeal.Insteadofattackingthemostcommoncausesofpainsuchastension,worry,boredom,frustration,insufficientsleep,overeating,poordiets,smoking,orexcessivedrinking,toomanypeoplereachalmostin

15、stinctivelyforthepainkillers-aspirins,barbiturates,codeine,tranquilizers,sleepingpills,anddozensofotherdesensitizingdrugs.现在学习的是第12页，共86页oCaliforniansandNewEnglandersarebothAmerican.Theyspeakthesamelanguageandabidebythesamefederallaws.But they are very different in their ways of life.Mobility-bothph

16、ysicalandpsychological-hasmadeagreatimpressiononthecultureofCalifornians;lackofmobilityisthemarkofthecustomsandmoralityofNewEnglanders.现在学习的是第13页，共86页3）主题句在段落末尾oAtthebeginningofawritingcourse,manystudentsearnlowgradesbecausetheyareinexperiencedwriters.Theysimplydontknowhowtowriteaneffectiveessay,and

17、intheprocessoflearningtodoso,theymakemistakes-andlowgrades.Suchgradesaffectthestudentsconfidenceandmorale,makingwritinganunpleasanttaskassociatedwithanxietyandfailure.Asaresult,studentsarediscouraged;insteadofworkingseriouslyontheirwriting,theyspendtimeworryingabouttheeasiestwaytoearnabettergradeont

18、henextpaper-usuallybywriting“safe”papersthataresimpleandcorrectbutlackinginthought.Therefore,the assigning of traditional grades in a freshman writing course often works against the purpose of the course-to help students learn to write better.现在学习的是第14页，共86页oAmericansmightbeembarrassedbecausetheirJa

19、panesefriendsaresoformalwiththem.JapanesemightfeelinsultedbecauseAmericanacquaintancesgreetthemcasually.Still,theformsofgreetinginbothcountriesonlyshowrespectforothers.It just happens that Americans and Japanese have a different way of looking at human relationships and thus have a different way sho

20、wing respect.现在学习的是第15页，共86页4）段落没有主题句o英文正规的文章，尤其是informativewriting很少没有主题句的，没有主题句的情况一般出现在记叙文体中。但是也有作者有意隐而不说的情况。oThebrightchildispatient.Hecantolerateuncertaintyandfailure,andwillkeeptryinguntilhegetsananswer.Whenallhisexperimentsfail,hecanevenadmittohimselfandothersthatforthetimebeingheisnotgoingtog

21、etananswer.Thismayannoyhim,buthecanwait.Veryoften,hedoesnotwanttobetoldhowtodotheproblemorsolvethepuzzlehehasstruggledwith,becausehedoesnotwanttobecheatedoutofthechancetofigureitoutforhimselfinthefuture.Notsothedullchild.Hecannotstanduncertaintyorfailure.Tohim,anunansweredquestionisnotachallengeoran

22、opportunity,butathreat.Ifhecantfindtheanswerquickly,itmustbegiventohim,andquickly;andhemusthaveanswersforeverything.Sucharethechildrenofwhomasecond-gradeteacheroncesaid,“Butmychildrenliketohavequestionsforwhichthereisonlyoneanswer.”Theydid;andbyamysteriouscoincidence,sodidshe.o(Impliedtopicsentence:

23、Toabrightchildapuzzleorunansweredquestionisachallenge,whereastoadullchilditisathreat.)现在学习的是第16页，共86页oFirstyoumustwaitforasunnyday.Rememberthattheraysofthesunaremostdirectbetween11A.M.and2P.M.Thisisthetimewhenyouwilltanthequickest.Attherighttimeandontherightday,pickanopenspotoutdoorsandlayoutalarget

24、owelorbeachmat.Youmaywanttobringalongseveralthings:suntanoil,aportableradio,abookormagazine,sunglasses,apillow.Itisagoodideanottostayinthesuntoolongatfirst.Beginwithahalfhour,andthengraduallyincreasethetimeyouspendinthesun.Certainpartsofyourbodywillburnmorequicklythanothers.Theseincludethebacksofyou

25、rknees,theinsideofyourelbows,yourshoulders,andyournose.Besuretocoverthesespotswithsuntanoilwhenyoufirstgooutside.Coverthemagainwithoilafteryouhavebeenoutsideinthesunforawhile.(Possible implied topic sentence:Taking a sunbath calls for careful planning.)现在学习的是第17页，共86页o主题句的写作要注意两个基本要求：第一是要包含主导思想(thec

26、ontrollingidea)；第二是要做到概括和具体的统一。o在一般情况下，一个段落要求作者只表达一个意思，不同的意思要放在另外的段落中表达，否则容易枝杈横生，使人不得要领。这个意思就是主导思想。例如我们不能说：“Wehadapleasantsummervacationbutsummervacationalwaysseemsshort.”。因为前面一个分句表述了一个事实，后面一个分句表述的是作者的一种看法。你不可能在一个段落中做到两方面都兼顾。o在具体的主题句写作中，作者还要注意把自己的思想用最切近的语言表达出来。既不能过于概括，也不能过于具体。如果过于概括，作者的写作往往会漫无目标或者以偏

27、概全，从而造成段落因为得不到应有的充实而显得空泛无力；如果主题句过于具体，作者的思想就没有发挥的余地，极易造成对一个意思的颠倒重复，而真正的意思却不能得到充分的表达。在具体的写作中，最容易出现的现象就是主题句过于概括的现象。现在学习的是第18页，共86页写主题句时要回避以下4个错误：IncompleteShould not be a questionMust not be too broadShould not contain phrases like“I think”,“In my opinion”,etc.现在学习的是第19页，共86页My mother has passed along

28、to me certain rules for getting along with others.Dont argue with parents;they will think you dont love them.Dont argue with children;they will think themselves victimized.Dont argue with spouses;they will think you are a tiresome mate.Dont argue with strangers;they will think you are not friendly.M

29、y mothers rules,in fact,can be summed up in two words:Dont argue.现在学习的是第20页，共86页oOurlifetodaydependsverymuchonenergy.Intownsandinvillages,onfarmsandinfactories,machineshavemadelifeeasierthanitusedtobe.Themachinesuseenergy,andenergyisneededforheating,lighting,communications,carryinggoods-everything.F

30、actoriesandindustrialplantsuseagreatdealofenergytomakethethingsthatweuseandbuyandsell现在学习的是第21页，共86页（主题句）No one can avoid being influenced by advertisements.（推展句1）Much as we may pride ourselves on our good taste,we are no longer free to choose whatever we want,for advertising exerts a subtle influen

31、ce on us.（推展句2）In their efforts to persuade us to buy this or that product,advertisers have made a close study of human nature and have classified all our little weakness.There are two ways in which one can own a book.The first is the property right you establish by paying for it,just as you have ma

32、de it a part of yourself and the best way to make yourself a part of it is by writing in it.现在学习的是第22页，共86页o请看下面的病例：Iwanttotalkaboutmyfather.Heisstrictwithhischildren,especiallyme.HewontletmeoutofthehouseunlessIvedoneallmyhomework.Heisatallandratherskinnyman.Somepeoplesayheisgood-looking.Hehasanices

33、treakofgrayinhishair.Helaughsalotandenjoyslife.Myfatherisinteresting.o读完这个段落，我们只能得到对于“我的父亲”的一些零乱的印象，但又都不鲜明。造成这种情况的主要原因是作者没有写好主题句。“Iwanttotalkaboutmyfather”这个主题句过于宽泛，没有起到限定话题的作用。所以作者一会儿讲作者父亲对待我的态度；一会儿讲父亲的外貌特征，过一会儿又说到父亲的性格特征。真如同笔下穿着溜冰鞋，滑来滑去，不知所终。o现在学习的是第23页，共86页o扩展句扩展句o一个段落是由主题句和扩展句共同构成的。扩展句是对主题句的延伸或证

34、明。它们之间的关系构成一个段落好坏的关键。o扩展句和主题句之间至少要注意以下两点：第一，意义的相关性（unity）；第二，逻辑的一致性(coherence)。o所谓的意义的一致性指的是所有的扩展句都必须是主题句的延伸或者证明，它对主题句能起到支持的作用。否则，这样的扩展句就应当删除掉。在这方面，我国古人有“丸之走盘”的形象比喻（“丸之走盘，横斜圆直，不可尽知也。其必可知者，是丸之不出于盘也。”杜牧），说的就是作者的笔不管怎样恣意汪洋，但是都不能超出一个范围，这个范围就是由主题句限定的。o但是只有内容上的一致性还不足以保证能写出一个好的段落。在行文过程中作者还要注意各个句子的正确、紧凑安排，也就

35、是要保证意义的连贯性。比如我们有B、C、D和E四个句子都可以证明A这个主题句，但是它们的位置如何安排呢？那就要根据它们之间的关系以及与主题句之间的关系来安排，并且还要有一定的过渡词来体现这种安排。只有这样，作者写来才会顺理成章，而读者读来也会如顺水行舟，没有妨碍。现在学习的是第24页，共86页o实现意义的连贯一般采取两种手段：逻辑的连贯和过渡词的使用。逻辑的连贯就是依靠扩展句自身具有的逻辑关系对句子进行正确的排列所实现的连贯；过渡词的使用就是依靠过渡词表现连贯的意义。o在内容的一致性上，初学者容易犯的错误主要有：1）跑题；2）重复；3）片面；而在意义的连贯上，初学者犯的主要毛病是信笔游走，行文

36、没有规矩，或者没有必要的过渡词。现在学习的是第25页，共86页病例病例o1、跑题、跑题oThereportindicatesthatbabiesoffatherswhosmokearelikelytobesmallerandweakerthanbabiesofnon-smokingfathers.Ofcourseitisalreadywellknownthatpregnantwomenwhosmokecandamagethehealthoftheirbabies.Mysistersmokedtwentycigarettesadaywhenshewasexpectingherfirstchild

37、.Anotherworryingpointisthatsmokingjustbeforethestartofthepregnancycanaffectthebabylater.Iheardrecentlythatcertainfoodsharmunbornbabies.o在这个例子中，主题句说的本来是父亲抽烟对于小孩子健康的影响，但是支持句讲的却是未来的母亲抽烟对孩子的影响。更可笑的是段落最后一句说的是某些食物可能对胎儿产生危害，真可谓离题千里了。现在学习的是第26页，共86页o2、岔题、岔题oThemainschoolbuildingcontainsmostoftheclassrooms.T

38、hatwasour“secondhome”,theplacewheremyclassmatesandIworked,studied,andlearnedforthreeyears.Beyondthatisthesciencebuilding.Thatswherewedidallourlaboratoryworkforchemistryandphysics.Ontherightsideofsciencebuildingisalibrary,wheretherearealargecollectionofbooksandperiodicals.Weallenjoyedreading,andfromt

39、hiswegotagreatdealofbenefits.Sinceourteacherswererichinknowledgeandtaughtusveryearnestly,wehadalwaysdonebetterthanstudentsofotherschoolsinjointexaminations.o从语言上讲这是一篇不错的段落，而且前半部分的描写相当有序：分别介绍了教学大楼、实验楼和图书馆。但是段落的最后两句话却又另起炉灶，谈到了其它方面，严格说来这是不容许的。另外本段还缺少一个主题句，请同学们为之代拟。现在学习的是第27页，共86页o3、重复、重复oWatchingTVtoom

40、uchisharmfultoyoureyes.IfyoustayinfrontofTVfortoolongtimeyoureyesmightgethurt.Youwillbenear-sighted.Youcannotseeclearlywhenyouread.Youevencannotseeclearlyafriendwhenyoumeethiminstreet.o在这个例子中，我们可以发现，这位同学的思绪总是要在一个地方停留一两步，然后才肯离开。第一句作为段首句是相当不错的，可是第二句却对它进行了重复，意思基本雷同。这完全是对有限空间的浪费。现在学习的是第28页，共86页o4、片面、片面o

41、OurschoolisanArmyschool,sowemustobeymanyrules.Becauseofthismyhouseisspecialinsomeways.First,ourhouseisveryclean,havenopieceofpaperontheground.Everythinginmyhouseisneat.Perhapssomeotherhouseisdirty,butifmyhouseisdirtywewouldbepunishedandforcedtocleanit.o这是一年级学生的习作，其中有不少语言错误。但就内容来讲，本段的支持句只讲了一个内容，也就是We

42、mustkeepourroomsclean。这是不足以证明Wemustobeymanyrules这一段首句的。现在学习的是第29页，共86页o练习练习o1、首先找出主题句，然后排列各句：、首先找出主题句，然后排列各句：o1.a.Computersspeedupregistrationbyprovidingup-to-dateinformationonopenclasses.ob.Theyassistinstructorsbymarkingmultiple-choicetests.oc.Computersnowperformmanytasksonmycampus.od.Computerscans

43、upplyadvisorswithinstantandcompleteinformationonrequirements,careerinformation,andpersonaldatawhiletheyaretalkingtoastudent.oe.Computerskeeprecordsforthebookstore,library,cafeteria,andmaintenancedepartment.现在学习的是第30页，共86页o2.a.MynewFuturecamerahasseveralfeaturesthatIlike.ob.Itadvancesthefilmaftereach

44、shotandautomaticallyrewindsitaftereachroll.oc.Comparedtoothercameras,itisinexpensive.od.IfIgettooclosetothesubject,italertsmewithabuzzer.oe.Itbeamsoutaninfraredraythatfocusesforme,eveninthedark.of.Itislightweightandcompact.现在学习的是第31页，共86页o3.a.Sometimesrapidly,sometimesslowly,theywentrelentlesslyupwa

45、rd.ob.LastweektheLaborDepartmentreported,however,thattheeconomysseventeen-yearinflationaryspiralhad,foronemonthatleast,finallybeenbroken.oc.DuringMarch,inflationactuallywentdowninsteadofup.od.Thisturnedatrendofwhateconomistscalldisinflationintooutrightdeflation.oe.Since1965,pricesintheU.S.economyhav

46、ebeenheadingoneway.现在学习的是第32页，共86页o4.a.Movingbackhomewithhisparentswouldsavehimquiteabit.ob.Hewasgladthathenolongerhadtoworkfull-timewhilegoingtoschool.oc.Hisincometaxrefundwasenoughtocoverhisexpensesfortherestofthesemester.od.Thedeansofficeapprovedhisstudentloan,andhecouldcuthisworkinghours.oe.Heha

47、dfinallypaidoffhiscar.of.Thingswerebeginningtolookup.现在学习的是第33页，共86页o5.a.TwoyounggirlstookturnsthrowingtheirFrisbeetotheirdog,whichleapedintotheairtocatchit.ob.Afamilyoftouristsstoodinfrontofthefountain,studyingamapandtryingtorememberwheretheyhadlefttheircar.oc.ItwasatypicalMaySundayafternoonatthepa

48、rk.od.Fromthefreewaythatcircledtheparkthesoundofafireenginecouldbeheard.oe.Acouplesatonablanket,theirbabycrawlingonthenearbygrass.现在学习的是第34页，共86页o2、根据下面的主题词完成一个主题句，然、根据下面的主题词完成一个主题句，然后展开构成一个段落：后展开构成一个段落：oThereasonwhyIreadbooksisthatoThestupidityofthenucleararmsrace.oTrafficisoneoftheessentialactivit

49、iesinoursociety.oSmokingisharmfultohealth.oTelevisionpresentsavividworldinfrontofus.现在学习的是第35页，共86页o3、根据下面的主题句，思考需要哪些内容来支持它：、根据下面的主题句，思考需要哪些内容来支持它：oThethrillofabigcity.oOwningacarisexpensive.oWhat a satisfying career should be oSpring is the most pleasant season of the year.oPeople take part in spor

50、ts for various reasons oovergrowth of population presents a threat to the existence of humansociety.现在学习的是第36页，共86页oSpringisthemostpleasantseasonoftheyear.Inspring,itiswarmandcomfortableandtheairisfreshandsoft.Theflowersareinfullbloom,attractingbeesandbirdstodancearound.Withthesnowmelting,thetreesbu