环保类雅思写作课件.pptx

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1、2.评分标准评分标准 1.考官会对task response任务回应,coherence and cohesion连贯和衔接,lexical resource词汇资源,grammatical range and accuracy语法范围与正确性，四项主要评分标准项打分考生在雅思作文中会遇到两个问题：用中文都不知道说什么（思维）；中文知道，无法用英文表达（语言）。思维对应第一个task response.如果中文构思就偏题、跑题，英语也必然如此。语言对应后三个：Coherence and cohesion考查：立场理想，贯穿始终，没有前言不搭后语，没有无关信息，逻辑通达Lexical resou

2、rce 用词贴切，掌握复杂高级词汇，拼写无错Grammatical range and accuracy:多种复杂句的灵活运用，语法和标点的正确性评分标准2.考官感觉字数不够时（underlength），通常是大作文长度少于答题纸的一半时，就会数出这篇作文的实际字数（no.of words），根据所缺字数扣不同的分值（penalty）小作文：12*13；大作文：12*213.是否跑题（off-topic）会单独评价4.一旦被察觉有背诵记忆（memorised）的模板句子，将会被扣分5.字迹太潦草影响辨认（illegible）会被扣分task response任务回应表达总论点的时候，一般适宜表

3、达某个事件的好处超过坏处，或是坏处超过好处，而不是这个事件只有好处或是坏处。（多使用副词）有意识地设置每个段落的中心句。如：首段最后一句，从第二段开始的每段首句。一个段落围绕一个观点来写，而且一个段落的段末不许出现新的观点。更重要的是，文章的更重要的是，文章的最后一段一般不许出现新的观点。一般由重申最后一段一般不许出现新的观点。一般由重申论点和补充说明构成论点和补充说明构成。平衡布局，不能有的段落写7句话，有的段落写2句coherence and cohesion连贯和衔接关联词分为三种：段间，句间，和句内关联词。段间：写作流程中介绍句间、句内关联词：1.表因果：Because,as,sinc

4、e;be due to;as a result of;for this reason.As a result;therefore;so；hence,thus,consequently 2.表举例：For example;for instance;such as,like 3.表递进：in addition,moreover,furthermore 4.表转折：however,nevertheless，But;yet;still;however 5.表对比：While,whilst,whereas;in contrast;conversely 6.表假设：If,unless,assume tha

5、t 7.表让步：While,whereas,AlthoughLexical Resources词汇资源正式，准确，多样注意：年份用数字避免使用缩写十以下的数字用英语单词，十以上可用阿拉伯数字不能使用口语化词语英式和美式英语不要混淆使用英式：centre,theatre,colourful,labour,realise,organisation,licence,defence美式：center,theater,colorful,labor,realize,organization,license,defenseGrammatical Range&Accuracy语法范围和精确度要求：准确，多样，

6、时态，简单句+复杂句注意：5分或5分以下的作文一般语法错误较多。6分作文则一般没有致命的语法错误，用词和句子基本准确。而7分以上的作文用词丰富（Variety）、句子结构复杂（Complexity）。考官范文平均每篇12句话，2简单2并列8从句。总体要求首尾都要回答问题，允许泛泛而谈。分段分点，每点之前必须有连接词。足够就好，不需要多；一两个大词就够，不需要滥句子结构多样性和允许语法错误的存在。低于Band 5的几种技术情况：1.没有完成写作任务2.格式错误3.字迹模糊，难以辨认4.Task 1和Task 2写反5.攻击考官3.题型分类议论类1）to what extent do you ag

7、ree or disagree 或 do you think the advantage outweigh the disadvantage 2）discuss both views and give your own opinion报告类3）cause+influence+solution（一般只出三者中的两个）eg.what caused this problem,and what solutions can solve this problem?题型一to what extent do you agree or disagree 或 do you think the advantage

8、outweigh the disadvantage 开头段+让步段（时间紧时可以省略）+支持段（论点 1）+支持段（论点 2）+结尾段（表明你自己的观点）Xiamen NOS IELTS Research Center12论文观点角度多；科技经济常切磋；肉体灵魂不放过；权利平等要把握；个人国家多权衡；文化道德思路扩；结合话题多思索；主体论证不难说。4.1 论点确立方法一Xiamen NOS IELTS Research Center13讨论是否将动物用于科学实验：Some scientists claim that experiments carried out on animals woul

9、d be crucial for potential breakthroughs（突破）in treating some of the most-feared incurable diseases.科技与经济Xiamen NOS IELTS Research Center14讨论社会道德下滑：Development of science and technology has given birth to materialism and capitalism which favor the research for economic growth and freedom of men.Conse

10、quently,no spiritual,moral,and traditional values are taken into account.Xiamen NOS IELTS Research Center15压力大的原因：The rapid development of science and technology makes work today more demanding than it used to be.Xiamen NOS IELTS Research Center16亲情淡漠的原因：The availability of a great variety of high-t

11、ech recreational facilities also diverts people from enjoying chats with the members of their families.Xiamen NOS IELTS Research Center17环保全球化的原因：Developing countries lack sufficient numbers of qualified scientists and other skilled personnel to cope with the increasingly serious environmental probl

12、ems,such as the ozone depletion,the marine pollution and the like.Xiamen NOS IELTS Research Center18如果说科技的发展是人类社会进步的助推器，那么经济的影响就是社会前进的方向标。经济的强弱通常会导致某一现象的出现或某种结果的产生。比如在讨论什么是最伟大的发明时，考生可能想到电话。那么如何来支持这一观点呢？试看下面的句子：Xiamen NOS IELTS Research Center19The development of the telephone created a new market fo

13、r the employment of women.The position of telephone operators was most often filled by women,creating a new world of opportunities for females to struggle for the equal rights to males.Xiamen NOS IELTS Research Center20雅思大作文常会出一些有关科技发明或娱乐方式的利与弊话题。那么不管是写好处还是坏处，考生应该从该发明或娱乐对人的肉体和灵魂这两方面去组织自己的分支观点。比如电脑对肉

14、体的影响：肉体与灵魂Xiamen NOS IELTS Research Center21You dont have to be a scientist to see that,due to overuse of the computer,a lot of kids get little exercise,which makes them obese.Another common disadvantage is that playing too much on the computer can cause bad eyesight.Xiamen NOS IELTS Research Center

15、221.高频率的信息切换影响孩子们的耐性。There is not deny in that with the advent（到来）of technology,our patience grows thin.Xiamen NOS IELTS Research Center232.媒体中的暴力节目扭曲孩子们的灵魂。Media violence affects children by:increasing aggressiveness and anti-social behavior;intensifying（加强）their fear of becoming victims;making the

16、m less sensitive to violence and to victims of violence;encouraging their appetite for more violence in entertainment and in real life.Xiamen NOS IELTS Research Center243.对媒体过多关注使孩子们变的孤僻而脱离现实生活。For lack of face-to-face contact,modern children tend to be more introverted(内向),unsocial,isolated and ind

17、ifferent than those kids in last century.Xiamen NOS IELTS Research Center25西方的文化在一定程度上可以浓缩为：权利、平等和自由。中国考生在人们该不该做什么事情或行为的时候应该多从这个方面去说服考官。权利与平等Xiamen NOS IELTS Research Center26动物的保护问题时，可以说：Animals are not created for humans any more than women are created for men,black for white.Xiamen NOS IELTS Rese

18、arch Center27在写到政府是否该花钱来发展武器时，可以说：There is no doubt that the advancement of military technologies is one of the greatest dangers to all human rights,including the most basic right to life itself.Xiamen NOS IELTS Research Center28在写到环境的重要性时，可以说：All human beings have the fundamental right to an enviro

19、nment adequate for their health and well-being.Xiamen NOS IELTS Research Center29在写到传统的西方道德中对私有财产的尊重时，可以说：Respect for property is no less important than respect for person.Indeed,respect for property is one species of respect for person.Property is the stuff of personal independence.It is,therefore,

20、an economic foundation of freedom.A society in which respect for property diminishes is one in which freedom diminishes.Xiamen NOS IELTS Research Center30有时候，一个现象或问题的出现是由于个人的努力和汗水或个人的疏忽，以及社会国家重视或政府的政策不恰当而导致的。个人与国家Xiamen NOS IELTS Research Center31运动员是否应该拿高薪：Athletes sweat and sacrifice physically an

21、d psychologically more than the average people,which can justify their high salary.Xiamen NOS IELTS Research Center32青少年犯罪的原因：Young peoples inexperience and gullibility easily lead them into traps.(个人的原因)Xiamen NOS IELTS Research Center33The government failing to establish supporting system to offer

22、 help to adolescents can explain this social issue.(国家的原因)Xiamen NOS IELTS Research Center34在男女平等的意义上使用个人和国家的分析角度也是很有效的：Every woman is worthy to be respected,educated,and safe from exploitation（宣传）.It is our responsibility and right to pray,promote,and protect the human and divine rights（神圣权利）of all

23、.The worlds stability and prosperity depend on it.Xiamen NOS IELTS Research Center35The full and equal participation of women in all spheres of life is essential to social and economic development,the abolition（废除）of war,and the ultimate establishment of a united world.Xiamen NOS IELTS Research Cent

24、er36文化和道德本来就是雅思大作文中较难的两个话题，而近来这两个话题考的频率又很高。考生不防也从这两个角度来准备一下主体段落的观点。文化与道德Xiamen NOS IELTS Research Center37反对外国文化倾入Globalization might undermine（破坏）cultural diversity.Multinational corporations promote a certain kind of consumerist culture,in which standard commodities,promoted by global marketing ca

25、mpaigns，exploiting basic material desires,create similar lifestyles,which is so-called Coca-Colanization.Xiamen NOS IELTS Research Center38该不该撒谎：The dishonest practice of telling lies will produce a perverse impact on ones personality.文化差异4.2 论点确立方法二1).内部参与主体2).外部涉及人员和机构3).分情况4).成本1).事件的内部参与者在经历这件事情

26、后所发生的变化：个人，国家，社会 Individual健康 physical health心理 psychological soundness情感 emotion道德 morality（moral norm and ethic codes）教育技能 education(academic achievements)and skill career development家庭 （parents,husband+wife,children）权利 right生活方式 way of life成本 time and efficiency CountryPolitical EconomicCultural

27、SocialSocial1.消除贫困halving/eliminate/reduce poverty 2.消除疾病,尤其是艾滋病disease3.扫除文盲,普及小学教育illiteracy4.保护环境:生态平衡,Ecosystem(equilibrium)balance 物种的多样性(biodiversity5.维护妇女基本权益和平等的社会地位和尊严feminism,women,female,Social structure/status/dignity,Some consider that history is little or no use to us.Others believe th

28、at studying history helps us to know the present.Discuss their views and give your own opinion.2).外部涉及人员和机构外部涉及人员和机构 事件的内部参与者以外的事物（系统）在经历了该事件的内部参与者以外的事物（系统）在经历了该事件以后所发生的变化：事件以后所发生的变化：系统包括：全社会，全世界，全球经济，自然，环系统包括：全社会，全世界，全球经济，自然，环境，传统文化，家庭等。富国帮助穷国可能会对整个境，传统文化，家庭等。富国帮助穷国可能会对整个世界经济有影响。世界经济有影响。3).分情况分情况:事

29、件的参与者或参与者之外的事物在不同情况下事件的参与者或参与者之外的事物在不同情况下所发生的变化：所发生的变化：事件发生的条件不同，后果也不同。事件发生的条件不同，后果也不同。Can we believe the news stories presented by journalists?分情况：可以根据新闻来源分类，如果是大新闻社的新闻，可以相分情况：可以根据新闻来源分类，如果是大新闻社的新闻，可以相信；如果是名誉不好信；如果是名誉不好notorious的新闻社，一般不相信；可以按照的新闻社，一般不相信；可以按照新闻内容分：在中国，一般政经新闻不会有假新闻，而对于文体新闻内容分：在中国，一般政

30、经新闻不会有假新闻，而对于文体新闻，多见假新闻。新闻，多见假新闻。穷国富国：如果富国帮助穷国时没有政治条件，穷国才能得到穷国富国：如果富国帮助穷国时没有政治条件，穷国才能得到真正好处。真正好处。4).看成本看成本:如果一件事物有好的结果，可以考虑成本低或者成本合理；如果一件事物有不好的后果，可以考虑成本高。1.Museum or library and computer?2.Outer space research?3.Artistic projects?4.3 论据填充举例举例:举例子说明观点的存在性举例子说明观点的存在性因果因果:为什么这个观点会产生以及这一观点所为什么这个观点会产生以及这

31、一观点所产生的影响（积极或消极）产生的影响（积极或消极）对比:描述相反的情形假设：假设此情况或假设相反情况出现4.2 论据填充论据填充1举例举例1.常见表达方式常见表达方式1)关联词as a proof,as an illustration,as an example,for example,for instance,in particular,just as,namely,specifically,to illustrate,to demonstrate.2)句型A good case in point is that A typical example can be found in Ta

32、ke for example,which may include4.2 论据论据填充填充1举例举例2.使用注意事项使用注意事项1)泛泛而非个人：杜绝举个人经历的例子，自己，亲戚，朋友-将个人例子普遍化，转化成一种普遍趋势。Eg:我曾经沉迷于网络游戏，这直接导致我学业失败。迷上网络游戏的学生更容易学业失败。2)少举纯中国式的例子：一个国家不代表整体，上升为很多国家的共同情况。Eg:中国很多工厂对废弃物不加处理就直接排放世界上很多工厂，特别 是发展中国家的工厂，3)杜绝中式谚语：不要硬性翻译中式谚语，外国谚语可以考虑，但也不可泛滥。4)注意控制字数，例子不要展开论述。一个论点的例子应控制在一句话左

33、右，有时甚至只需一个名词短语就可以完成。论据填充论据填充1举例举例3.实例解析实例解析例如，剑5 test 2,a gap year,选择工作或者旅游的危险时用了举例的方法：However,there are certainly dangers in taking time off at that important age.Young adults may end up never returning to their studies or finding it difficult to readapt to an academic environment.They may think th

34、at it is better to continue a particular job or perhaps do something completely different from a university course.雅思的举例论证方法不同于我们熟悉的举实例。当列举gap year的危险时，不可以举某某同学高中毕业后到一家公司工作，由于失误导致该公司的经济损失或某某同学高中毕业后周游列国，不幸受伤等等。雅思写作的文体属学术论文，要求科学严谨，由于个案不具备普遍性，因此不能作为证据。同理，考官也极少用for example这个表达实例的短语。雅思举例的方法局限于抽象的泛泛的例子。论据

35、论据填充填充2因果因果1)给出原因Due to/owing to/because of/thanks to,As/since/because,The reason why is that be related/linked to be associated/connected with contribute to/give rise to.,in that/considering thatSome plastics behave in a similar way to candle wax,in that they melt under heat and can be molded into

36、new forms.The reason why people like to move more from rural areas to urban areas is rooted in the fact that the city homes more social and economic opportunities.论据填充论据填充2因果因果2)阐述结果:通过阐述一个现象或事物产生的结果的是正面的还是负面的来说明其性质，从而论证自己的观点。therefore,hence,thus,as a result,consequently,interestingly,fortunately,un

37、fortunately,surprisingly,unsurprisingly.Eg.Studying other historical periods gives insights into different ways of life.As a result,they will become more aware of the kind of society that we live in.Therefore,they will be able to compare these societies with our own.论据填充论据填充2因果因果2.使用注意事项使用注意事项1)主观与客

38、观相结合在分析原因时，建议考生不仅要关注客观原因，比如经济不景气，工作经验少等人或事本身具有的属性或特点，还应当考虑从主观方面着手，比如有的大学毕业生眼高手低好高骛远，大众想要有更舒适的生活等人的意识或精神。2)积极与消极相结合在引出结果时，考生不仅需要关注原因引发的积极结果，有时也可以根据自己的需要论述它所引发的消极结果。特别是在应对讨论式的观点题时，这种思想体现的最为明显。论据填充论据填充2因果因果3.实例解析实例解析下面我们用因果论证来论证一下教师的监督作用：1)Only under the supervision of a teacher can students study effe

39、ctively due to the fact that teenagers often lack self-discipline.2)The importance of a teachers supervision is attributed to students lack of self-discipline.3)Studentslack of self-discipline contributes to the importance of a teachers supervision.考生们不必担心论证中句子太短的问题。分论点的展开部分不必太长，通常30-40字最好，大概1-2句话。太

40、长就会被扣上overdevelop的帽子。如有的考生一段只有一个分论点，论证过程肯定罗嗦。因果论证的句子通常短小，重点注意句型的变化，即在一篇文章中不要重复同样的句型。用过连词，就换动词;用过副词，就换介词，从而达到句型的多样化。A：具体情况反向对比 B:过去和现在的对比论据论据填充填充3对比对比 Should young adults want independence from their parents as soon as possible?TS:At the comtempary society,moral guidance should be offered by parents

41、to ensure those young fellows to refrain from misleading by inappropriate materials.第一句：如果年轻人没有适当的保护没有适当的保护直接面对面对社会上所有的诱惑诱惑，他们就会比和父母生活在一起的同和父母生活在一起的同龄人龄人更有可能走上犯罪道路走上犯罪道路。If young adults are exposed without proper protection from their parents to all the temptations and evils of society,they are more

42、 likely to fall into a life of crime than people of the same age who still live with their parents.第二句：转折 相反，对于那些依然和父母生活的年轻人来说，他们会知道当他们有困难的时候该怎么做。conversely,for those who still stay with their families,they might be informed of correct ways when they are in trouble.思路：条件状语从句 目的状语从句论据论据填充填充4假设假设5.1 议

43、论类开头段练习第三句作者观点第一句第一句背景：必须背景：必须要扣题，如果想出来的背景太要扣题，如果想出来的背景太远，割肉！远，割肉！第二句第二句通常通常情况下写成：情况下写成：问题引起争议有人认为还有人认为Opening 文章背景文章背景Xiamen NOS IELTS Research Center64文章背景万用句型One of the most amazing/disgusting features brought about by the scientific and economic advances is(that).It is quite common in this day a

44、nd age thathas been bought to spotlight recentlyIt is a truth universally acknowledged that.It is self-evident that Xiamen NOS IELTS Research Center65引出论题万用表达描述背景导致意见分歧This ignites/triggers public debate about(whether)Yet at the meantime,whether has been in the center of controversy/debate/discussio

45、n.What is under controversy is直接描述存在意见分歧People in the contemporary world have mixed views as to whether.There are various/a range of different opinions/perspectives on the issue/subject of Xiamen NOS IELTS Research Center66本文观点万用表达Advantage and disadvantage题Below are some benefits and drawbacks of t

46、his issue.The advantages and disadvantages of this issue will be presented in the subsequent paragraphs.(其他表示好坏的说法：pros/cons,merits/demerits,strength/weakness,plus/minus)宗旨：重申总论点和最重要的分论点宗旨：重申总论点和最重要的分论点结构：结构：首词（表示总结的关联词）首词（表示总结的关联词）+重申总论点重申总论点 +补充说明补充说明6.1 议论类结尾段练习Xiamen NOS IELTS Research Center68重

47、申观点万用表达In a nutshell/in sum/all in all/in conclusion/It is an inescapable conclusion that Therefore,for the above reasons,I think highly ofIn conclusion,I once again restate my belief that On the basis of all the aspects discussed,I think that.To conclude,for the reasons stated above,I maintain that

48、From what has been discussed above,we may safely draw the conclusion thatFor my part,after considering all the arguments presented,I insist that In retrospect,from what have been mentioned above,we have every reason to draw the conclusion that.When all the factors are examined,we may safely come to

49、the conclusion that Xiamen NOS IELTS Research Center697.主体段套话练习 主体段落段落主体段落段落由关联词由关联词+分论点分论点+分论点的论证分论点的论证构构 成成 分论点和分论点的论证之间可能有关联词。分论点和分论点的论证之间可能有关联词。Xiamen NOS IELTS Research Center70首句引出理由万用表达There are numerous reasons why,but they all come down to the following three major ones.Several factors are

50、involved in Several factors are involved in the reason why I suggest museums be torn down.Several factors are involved in the museums being torn down.Several factors are involved in that the museums are torn down.Three factors seem to cause 1 顺接顺接(一边倒的内部一边倒的内部)议论类：议论类：并列并列 For one thing For another