段平-技术与商务交流英语（第二版）Chapter 4 Technical Style and Rhetoric 教参.docx

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1、Chapter 4Technical Style and RhetoricRhetoric means the art and skill in using language effectively and persuasively. Style is the integration of various rhetorical skills that reflects the characteristics of a certain register, genre or time.修辞是有效地和有说服力地使用语言的艺术和技巧。文体是反映某一语域、体裁或时代 的一套修辞技巧的综合表现。The s

2、tyle of modern technical writing follows the three criteria of technical communication: comprehensibility, usability, and accessibility.现代技术写作文体遵循专 业信息交流的三项基本准则：信息的易理解性、易使用性和易获得性。To follow the technical style, you should adopt specific rhetorical skills that are commonly used in technical communicat

3、ion. These rhetorical skills tell you how to make the choices that determine whether your ideas will be understood or persuasive, how to select the words that will move your readers to accept what you have written, and how to organize those words into the sentences and paragraphs that ultimately wil

4、l inform and persuade your readers. This chapter classifies these rhetorical skills into four principles. By following these principles you will be able to create your documents effectively.在专业信息交流中，何为有效？要明确这一点，首先要了解专业交际的目的。专业信息交流的目的有两个：Inform and persuade.告知与劝说。Inform effectively: make your readers

5、 understand your idea easily-quickly and accurately.W 效告知：使读者容易地一迅速而又准确地一理解你的意见。Persuade effectively: make your readers accept your idea easily or willingly.有效劝说： 使读者 容易地（乐意地）接受你的意见。因此，要根据如何有效地达到这两个目的来确定我们所使用的修辞原则和修辞技巧。根据专业交际学的理论与实践，为达到有效告知与劝说的目的，我们需要遵循专业写作 的四项修辞原则： Selecting appropriate words 选择适当词

6、语 Writing clear sentences 撰写明白句子 Organizing document effectively 有效组织文件 Making your document user-friendly 使文件对用户是友好的I. Selecting Appropriate Words选择适当词语的原则When you actually get down to writing, the first thing is to choose words. A basic rule of good writing is to make sure that your readers can un

7、derstand and follow what they are reading. You should always keep in mind your readers9 level of familiarity with the topic, and choose your words with caution. You should ask yourself who will read the document, and whether different people will read different parts. Choose words that are correct a

8、nd that readers understand. Even expert readers appreciate simple and clear writing.在实际写作中首先要考虑选择什么样的词语来组织句子。有效写作的基本原则是使文件便于 读者快速地理解并正确地执行。为使尽可能多的读者看懂专业文件，在不改变科技文体、不种结构通常由“弱动词+动词性名词”构成。弱动词(weak verbs)指那些具有动词词性， 但并不表示具体动作的动词，动词性名词是由动词派生的抽象名词。The computer program performed an analysis and made an eval

9、uation of our new system.In this sentence, perform and made serve as predicate verbs grammatically but does not express any action, the real actions are expressed by the following nouns derived from verbs. Such construction only adds the length and difficulty to the sentence without adding any meani

10、ng. We can make the sentence shorter and easier to understand by eliminating the weak verbs and the nominalizations. For example:该句中的动词perform和make并不表示任何实质性动作，是弱动词，实际动作是由做宾 语的抽象名词，即动词性名词analysis和evaluation来表示的。这样的结构除了使句子更长， 结构更复杂之外并没有增加任何实质性的含义，增加了阅读时间和理解难度。应该直接使用 强动词(strong verbs),即表示动作的动词做谓语，如：The

11、 computer program analyzed and evaluated our new system.修改后的句子删除原来的弱动词谓语，把动词性名词改为强动词，使句子更加直接简练，更 加突出动作，便于快速理解。Weak verbs (such as be, have, give, make, come, take, perform, accomplish) does not express specific actions when they are used with nominalizations. Use verbs that express a definite action

12、 in a sentence.Action Verb: consider can assume conclude summarize investigate describe liquidate reconcile standardizeWeak Verb + Nominalization: take into consideration have the ability to make an assumption come to the conclusion give a summary of conduct an investigation of provide a description

13、 of effect a liquidation bring about a reconciliation involve the standardization ofAvoiding Long Sentences Complicated in Structures 避免结构复杂的长句Long sentences (generally over 25 words) with complex structures make details hard to remember and relationships hard to identify. They are sometimes so comp

14、licated that readers may either not bother to work out the meaning or may arrive at the wrong meaning. These sentences should be broken into several shorter sentences, each containing only one or two ideas.为什么长句难以理解呢？明白的信息是读者不需重复阅读就能够理解的信息。根据认知心理学的研究，人们在摄 取信息的过程中首先是短期记忆在起作用。短期记忆的存储量是有限的，George Mille

15、r(1956) 的研究指出，短期记忆一次最多可以存储“72个信息单元”。而且，短期记忆的存储量会随 着信息复杂性的增加而迅速降低。如果句子过长并且结构复杂，超过了短期记忆一次性摄入的信息量，读者就不能迅速吸 收全部信息，待读到句尾时，前面的信息已经遗忘，需要再从头反复阅读，这就降低了阅读 速度。因此，过长和过难的句子往往导致如下结果：读者略去不读；读者不求甚解；读者理 解错误。Long Sentence:The invention of nuclear weapons and the subsequent development by the United States and the Sov

16、iet Union of many thousands of strategic nuclear weapons forced a slow and painful recognition that the new power thus acquired forever changed not only the relationship between the two superpowers but also the relationship of humankind to the institution of warfare itself. 核武器的发明及其后美国和苏联研制出成干上万的战略性

17、核武器这一现实，迫使人们痛 苦地、逐渐地认识到，由发展核武器而获取的新能量不仅永远改变了两个超级大国之间 的关系，而且也永远地改变了人类与战争惯例之间的关系。Short Sentences:The United States and the Soviet Union invented nuclear weapons and later developed many thousands of strategic warheads in the nuclear arms race against each other. However, they were forced slowly and pa

18、infully to recognize that the new power thus acquired forever changed the relationship between them. They also realized that the new power forever changed the relationship of humankind to the practice of warfare itself.对于句子多长应该被确定为长句，目前还没有统一的说法。下面的意见可以给我们在确 定句子长度时提供一些参考。 微软Word程序的语法检查工具(Grammar Chec

19、ker)把句的词数限定为60个词，超 过这一限制便会有绿线提示。 Fraser (1997)认为，20个词以内的句子通常是最容易阅读的，如果句子超过30个 词，就应该考虑通过编辑来缩短句子或分为两句。 Houp等(1998)提出了一个平均值，认为多数专业作者把文件中句子的平均值控制 在20个词稍多一点之内，其中可以有短句，也可以有较长的句子。使用长句时应注意适当使用标点符号和连接词以明确各部分之间的关系，还应注意长短句 搭配使用，以体现语言的变化。6. Avoiding Negative Sentences 避免否定句Negative sentences are indirect becaus

20、e they imply what we should do by telling us what not to do. Just like forcing readers to perform mental gymnastics, negatives may slow down readers9 speed in reading. Therefore, you should use straightforward positive statements whenever possible.否定句是一种间接表达方式，通过告诉人们不做什么来暗示应该做什么，特别是双重否定或 强调式否定，增加理解难

21、度，影响阅读速度。因此，尽可能使用直接的肯定表述。Negative： Although passive voice constructions are grammatically not unacceptable, they are not easy to follow.Positive： Although passive voice constructions are grammatically acceptable, they are difficult to follow.Check your writing to see if you have used negative constr

22、uctions such as those in the left-hand column below and, if possible, replace them with the corresponding positive constructions in theright-hand column.Positive: only when only if accept agree legal succeedNegative: not until not unless not reject not disagree not illegal not failAvoiding Noun Stri

23、ngs避免名词修饰语连用A noun can be used to modify another, but if you use two or more nouns to modify another, the string of words can be hard to read because it is difficult to determine their relations. For example: The newly developed computer system can be configured to meet a wide range of user data com

24、munication requirements.In this sentence, there are three nouns before requirements as its modifiers. There can be at least three possible relations among these nouns.该句中有一个名词定语连用的短语user data communication requirements,由于前置定语无 法明确显示各名词之间的关系，这个短语可以有三种解释： .requirements for communicating users data. .传

25、达用户数据的要求 .users requirements for data communication. .用户对数据交流的要求 . .data requirements for user communication.用户交流对数据的要求在这种情况下，读者就不得不徘徊于几种不同的解释之间来猜测词组的含义，这就给读者， 特别是非专业读者，造成理解困难甚至是误解，降低了阅读的速度和效率。科技英语写作是 作者负责型写作，作者必须了解读者，在写作中采用便于读者理解的修辞手法，避免使用会 给读者造成理解困难的表达方式。因此，在写作中要避免名词前置定语连用。可以采用如下办法来解决名词定语连用的语义关系不清

26、的问题。Thus the noun string creates confusing relations among these nouns, which is especially difficult for nonprofessional readers to decide. There are several ways to clarify the relations among the nouns in a noun string.Using prepositions to change pre-modifiers into post modifiers. You can change

27、 the pre-modifiers into post-modifiers by adding appropriate prepositions. For example:(1) This study aimed at devising a system for further growth hormone secretion control mechanism investigations.(2) This study aimed at devising a system for further investigations of the ways of controlling the s

28、ecretion of growth hormone.该研究的目的是为进一步研究控制生长刺激素的方式 设计一个系统。In Example (1), the word investigations is modified by five nouns. They pack too much information into one phrase and create confusing relations. Example (2) changes the pre-modifiers into post modifiers by adding prepositions. Although prepo

29、sitional phrases take up more space, they clarify the relations among these modifiers.该例的主语method前有六个修饰语，其中5个是名词growth, hormone, secretion, control, mechanism,造成语义关系不清。解决办法是把前置定语改为后置 定语。Changing a Noun Phrase into a Nonfinite Verb Phrase 将名词短语变为非限定动词短语.A verb phrase usually presents a clearer relati

30、on among its members than a noun phrase. If a noun phrase contains verbal nouns, you may change it into a nonfinite verb phrase.(3) His job involves fault analysis systems troubleshooting handbook preparation.(4) His job involves preparing troubleshooting handbooks for fault-analysis systems.(他的工作包括

31、为事故分析系统编写故障排除手册。)The word preparation in Example (3) is a verbal noun that can be changed into a verb. Thus the gerundial phrase led by preparing in Example (4) presents a much clearer relation than the noun phrase in Example (3).在识别该句意群的时候，大脑会自然地把谓语和其后的第一个名词构成动宾词组involves fault analysis,而后则需要反复地调整识

32、别才能够最后得出正确的结构involves.preparationo由于 preparation是一个动作名词，把该句的宾语部分改为动名词短语形式，同时使用连字符明确前 置定语之间的关系。(5) The factory is installing a hazardous materials dispersion monitor system.(6) The factory is installing a system to monitor the dispersion of hazardous materials.(工厂正在安装一套监控危险物料扩散的系统。)The noun modifier

33、monitor in Example (5) can be used both as a noun and a verb. By changing it into a verb to lead an infinitive phrase, Example (6) clarifies the confusing relations of the noun string in Example (5).该句的宾语system前面有四个修饰语，其中三个为名词，使读者难以迅速理清他们之间的关 系。由于monitor具有动作意义，把宾语的前置定语改为由动词不定式引导的后置定语可以使 词语之间的语义关系更加明

34、确。Using Hyphens 使用连字符.If you want to keep certain noun premodifiers, you can use a hyphen to indicate the direct relation between two modifiers in a noun string.(7) The instruction explains how to operate the main gear inboard door retraction winch handle.(8) The instruction explains how to operate

35、the main-gear inboard-door retraction-winch handle.说明书解释如何操作驱动主齿轮内侧舱门的绞车手柄。Using a Relative Clause 使用关系从句. If you find that it is not enough to clarify the relations among the premodifiers by using hyphens only, such as in Example (7), you can use a relative clause to explain the meaning and the rel

36、ations in detail.(9) The instruction explains how to operate the winch handle that retracts the inboard door of the main gear.该句的表语。peration前有五个名词和两个形容词修饰语，造成了繁琐复杂的修饰关系，可采 用定语从句对疑难部分加以解释。III. Organizing Your Document Effectively 有效组织文档After composing separate sentences, you need to put them together

37、 into paragraphs and organize paragraphs into a complete document. The organization of your document should be logical and coherent, making it easier for your readers to get through the document quickly and easily, and to learn the most important information they need to know. Document organization

38、includes: Organize sentences into paragraphs or chunks of information. Arrange paragraphs and chunks of information to form a complete document. Design your document so that it is easy to navigate, i.e. make it easy for readers to find the information they need quickly.在组成单独的句子之后，你需要将它们组成段落，进而将段落组织成

39、一个完整文档。文 档的组织应该具有逻辑性和连贯性，使读者更容易快速、轻松地浏览，并学习到他们需要知 道的重要信息、。文档结构包括：将句子组成段落或信息块；布局段落和信息块，形成一个完 整文档；设计文档，使其易于导航，也就是说，使读者更容易快速找到他们需要的信息。1. Arranging Sentence Order for Coherence 注意连贯性A good technical writing should be coherent, that is, phrases, sentences and paragraphs should be logically connected and

40、consistent in relationship. A coherent document leads readers smoothly from one point to the next so that the reader can easily understand the entire flow.A coherent writing generally follows a linear order-each sentence builds on the preceding sentence and looks ahead to the following sentence. Sen

41、tences generally work best when the beginning looks back at familiar information and the end provides the new information. This given-new construction strengthens the coherence of a document. In such constructions, new information is connected to what readers already know, either from their backgrou

42、nd knowledge or from the immediately preceding text. The passage in Figure 4-2 consists of five sentences that are typically arranged in given-new constructions.连贯性指的是句子之间的连接应该是合乎逻辑和前后一致的，可以引导读者从一个观点 顺利地移动到下一个观点，有利于读者容易地理解整个文件。句子间的连贯性可以通过线性顺序结构来实现。这样的顺序使每一个句子都是建立在前 面句子的基础之上，并为后面的句子做好铺垫，从而加强了信息的连贯性。如

43、前所述，“已知信息+新信息的句子结构符合大脑思维的自然顺序，是典型的线性顺 序结构。段落可以按照Given+New的顺序组织信息。这样的段落结构通过已知信息(上文所提到的 信息，或者读者的背景知识)引出新信息，可以使读者建立旧知识与新知识的联系，由旧概 念关系激活新概念关系，从而降低理解难度，提高理解效率。下面是一段按照线性顺序结构组织的段落，Figure 4-2 Given-New Constructions(1) given A to new B A refrigerator A is mainly composed of a compressor, a condenser and an

44、evaporator, which are connected to one another by tubes B.(2) given B to new C The compressor B compresses the low-pressure gas from theevaporator and changes it into hot high-pressure gas C.(3) given C to new D(4) given D to new E(5)given E to new FThis resultant hot high-pressure gas C enters the

45、condenser, where heat is transferred into the air by radiation and the gas condenses to become cold high-pressure liquid D.This liquid D passes through the evaporator, where the pressure on the liquid is reduced E.The liquid with reduced pressure E turns into gas by absorbing heat, and thus the temp

46、erature within the refrigerator decreases F.2. Using the Topic Sentence 使用主题句The paragraph is the basic unit of most technical documents, and the topic sentence is the heart of the paragraph. The topic sentence introduces the paragraph or states its major idea. Not every paragraph has a topic senten

47、ce, but most paragraphs in technical writing should.The topic sentence is most commonly placed near the beginning of the paragraph. This method of paragraph organization is clear and straightforward. The topic sentence may be placed at the end of the paragraph as a means of summarization. In this ca

48、se, the reader has to hold in mind all the details until the end of the paragraph. This could be difficult for inexperienced readers or readers who do not fully understand the material. If the material is highly technical or conceptually difficult, it is better to place the topic sentence at the beg

49、inning of the paragraph.段落是文章的主要信息单位，而主题句则是段落的核心。主题句引入一段的话题或者陈 述一段的主旨。尽管并非所有段落都有主题句，但大多数专业文件的段落都应有主题句。主题句一般应放在段首，这是典型的演绎法段落结构，这样的安排有两个优点：第一， 它有助于提高信息的可获得性。把主题句放在段首，读者不必深入段落的每一个句子，只需 迅速浏览每一段开头的主题句便可了解文章的大意，是一种迅速查阅主要信息的有效手段。 第二，它有助于提高信息的可理解性。主题句在段首点明本段论述的主题，使段落的主题首 先从新信息变为已知信息，然后再使辅助句围绕这一已知信息展开讨论。这样，每一个辅助 句都是由主题句引出的，从而达到了从已知信息引出新信息的线性顺序，便于读者迅速理解。