专题12 -2021年北京卷英语真题作文深度点评与满分作文赏析.docx

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1、专题12-2021年北京卷英语真题作文深度点评与满分作文赏析【试题再现】假设你是红星中学高三学生李华。你和英国好友Jim原定本周末一起外出，你因故不能赴约。请你用英文给他写一封电子邮件，内容包括： 1. 表达歉意并说明原因；2. 提出建议并给出理由。注意：1. 词数100左右；2. 开头和结尾已给出，不计入总词数。Dear Jim, _Yours,Li Hua【试题解读】1. 从内容上来说，本篇作文需要考生给出一个合理的“理由”以及“解决方案”。一般情况下，“受伤”这个理由是最容易被对方接受的。不过，在写作时，“伤”要合理，而且要尽量与之后的“解决方案”匹配。比如，如果你的“伤”是骨折，而给出

2、的“解决方案”是下周再一起出去，那么显然就是不合理的。所以考生们在写作时，需要设计要点，让作文合情合理。2. 从语言上来说，今年的这篇英语作文有较为严格的字数要求，要控制在100120字之间。由于内容相对简单，所以考生在写作时，只要能保证不出现语法或拼写错误，就会有一个比较保险的分数。如果能在作文中写出一些漂亮的词汇或短语，如apology/make up for/be sorry for any inconvenience caused等，分数就不会太低。除了内容和细节之外，考生还应该在作文中加入体现“交际感”的句子，如“ Would you mind if ? ”Please allow

3、me to say sorry again.”“ I am sorry I cannot and I trust that you will be able to understand.“等。3. 考生最后需要考虑的一个角度是结构。本篇作文符合应用文经典的三段式，首段交代写作背景，表达写作目的，次段指出未能赴约原因，尾段给出补救方案，表明理由，并再次表达歉意。要想让作文脱颖而出，考生还要关注连接成分的使用，如递进、因果等结构。总体来说，2021年高考北京卷英语作文相对比较简单，考生只要能平稳心态，考前按部就班的复习，那么顺利完成这篇作文，应该是比较容易的事情。【满分范文欣赏1】Dear Jim

4、,I am writing to make a sincere apology to you01 that I will not be able to attend the photographic exhibition 02 which is scheduled to take place 03 this Saturday. I do feel bad about informing you on such a short notice04, but I need to have a physical checkup 05 this Saturday afternoon and I almo

5、st forgot.To visit the exhibition06, first you need to take the bus and then change subway lines twice. It is kind of complicated. Considering that 07 you have only been in Beijing for a week and are likely to 08 have a problem getting around, I could ask my cousin, who was born and bred in Beijing

6、09,to go with you to the exhibition venue10. Not only is he familiar with Beijing, he is fluent in English as well11. In other words, he could be your perfect tour guide.If my cousin is not available on Saturday, as a last resort12, we might go to the photographic exhibition some other time. I hear

7、that it will be held again next month.Anyway, I am sorry again13 for not being able to go with you this time, but do not hesitate to14 contact me if I can be of any further help15.Yours,Li Hua【范文解析】01. 开门见山地说明写信的原因，make a sincere apology可看作be sorry的升级版。02. photographic exhibition，摄影展。这样写显得较为具体，比part

8、y或show好一些。而且这两个词比较长，能充分体现考生的英语功底。03. 可看作是which will begin的升级版。04.inform somebody on such a shortnotice，临时通知某人，高级表达。05. have a physical checkup，体检。比爸妈生病了需要人照顾等理由好一些，不落俗套。06. 状语提前，尽量用不同的结构作为一个句子的开头。07. 分词结构，书面表达加分项。08. be likely to，有可能。可作为下面might的替换版本，增加句法多样性。09. 插入语，增加句法多样性；born and bred押头韵，书面表达加分项。1

9、0. exhibition venue，展览的地点，高级表达。11. 倒装句，书面表达加分项。12. as a last resort，万不得已，高级表达。13. 再次道歉，体现诚意。14. do not hesitate to，尽管，相当于feel free to，高级表达。15. be of any further help，可看作help的升级版。 【满分范文欣赏2】Dear Jim, How is everything going? We have planned to go for a walk in Haidian Park this weekend, where we could

10、 enjoy the beautiful scenery of early spring. But I am afraid I couldnt make it. I was severely injured in a soccer game last night. The doctor examined me carefully and told me that I had to stay in bed for at least one week. I asked him whether there was any possibility that I could recover faster

11、, yet the answer was negative. My condition doesnt allow me to go anywhere until my legs are fully recovered. It is a pity for me to miss this trip that I have been longing for. Shall we put it off until next weekend if the weather permits? Looking forward to your reply.Yours,Li Hua【满分范文欣赏3】Dear Jim

12、,I apologize for not being able to go out with you this weekend. I got drenched from the pouring rain yesterday and subsequently, I caught a heavy cold. The doctor suggested that I stay in bed for the next few days.How about we go out next weekend? I heard there is a new Sichuanrestaurant opening ne

13、xt Saturday.Why dont we try it out? After that, we can go hiking in the nearby hills. I checked the weather forecast and next weekend will have fantastic weather.I apologize again for having to cancel this weekends plan and I look forward to seeing you next Saturday.Yours,Li Hua【满分范文欣赏4】Dear Jim,I h

14、ope this email finds you in good health and spirit.I am writing to inform you that I wont be able to attend your concert this weekend. The school released our examination schedule an hour back, and I have a maths test on Monday. You are aware of how deplorable I am at maths.I am sorry for canceling

15、at such short notice. I want to make it up to you. We can try the new Thai place near your office next weekend. If you are available, I will book a table for us. Yours,Li Hua. 【满分范文欣赏5】Dear Jim, How is everything going? We have planned to go for a walk in Haidian Park this weekend, where we could en

16、joy the beautiful scenery of early spring. But I am afraid I couldnt make it. I was severely injured in a soccer game last night. The doctor examined me carefully and told me that I had to stay in bed for at least one week. I asked him whether there was any possibility that I could recover faster, y

17、et the answer was negative. My condition doesnt allow me to go anywhere until my legs are fully recovered. It is a pity for me to miss this trip that I have been longing for. Shall we put it off until next weekend if the weather permits? Looking forward to your reply.Yours,Li Hua【满分范文欣赏6】Dear Jim,Im

18、 sorry to inform you that I cant go out with you this weekend. Ive just been told that I have to go and visit my sick grandfather in the countryside, who was suddenly admitted to the hospital. I hope the change wont cause you too much trouble.How about going out next Saturday morning? If its conveni

19、ent for you, lets meet at the school gate at 9: 00. Please let me know what time suits you best. I should be available anytime next weekend.In addition, next Saturday, there will be a flower show in Beihai Park. Then we can go to see the flowers together.I am looking forward to your early reply.Yours,Li Hua